Building Resilience: How to Turn Setbacks into Sacred Turning Points

You’re not stuck or broken—just living by old patterns that steal your power. This episode shows you how to take it all back.
You’re not stuck or broken—just living by old patterns that steal your power. This episode shows you how to take it all back.
Kellan Fluckiger tears down the lies of victim energy, perfectionism, and learned helplessness, guiding you to reclaim your sovereignty and create Your Ultimate Life.
Discover why your past doesn’t define you, how micro-decisions shape your destiny, and the daily rituals that restore your agency—no matter what life throws at you.
👉 Want to go deeper? Get the free 5 Steps to Your Ultimate Life at yourultimatelife.ca or join the Dream Build Write It Challenge on Sept 29 to turn your story into a movement: https://www.dreambuildwriteit.com.
00:00 - Untitled
00:07 - Creating Your Ultimate Life
03:48 - Building Resilience: Turning Setbacks into Setups
19:11 - Turning Setbacks into Setups for Good Things
27:04 - Building Resilience: Turning Setbacks into Setups
33:28 - Cultivating Resilience and Growth
Welcome to the show.
Speaker ATired of the hype about living a dream?
Speaker AIt's time for truth.
Speaker AThis is the place for tools, power and real talk, so you can create the life you dream and deserve your ultimate life.
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Speaker AYou have infinite power.
Speaker AHey, thanks for being here today.
Speaker ACrazy life, isn't it?
Speaker AThings just happen all the time.
Speaker AYou're not.
Speaker AYou're not expecting somebody gets sick.
Speaker AMaybe you've been sick recently.
Speaker AI'll tell you a couple things that have happened for me, even silly little things.
Speaker AThis morning, my wife, who's my business partner, and my holy angel, her name is Joy, came downstairs.
Speaker ABig sad look.
Speaker AMy computer won't start.
Speaker AWell, you've all had that.
Speaker AThat could be anything from a catastrophic failure to nothing, right?
Speaker ABut you, those things, they happen.
Speaker ASo I had to stop, go up and see what it was, reset the BIOS as a first effort started.
Speaker AYippee, crisis averted.
Speaker AAnd so that was a tiny one, but same thing, you go out in the garage, there's a flat tire, or someone sends you a message, a deal you've been counting on.
Speaker AOoh.
Speaker ADoesn't go through.
Speaker AWell, we've decided to go with someone else.
Speaker AOh, we've decided we're not quite ready yet.
Speaker AEver had that happen?
Speaker ABoy, have I.
Speaker AI just got an email from someone.
Speaker AIt was, you know, not a giant deal, but five figures and email.
Speaker AWell, just don't.
Speaker AYeah, don't think it's what we're going to do right now.
Speaker AAnd that's after several assurances that this was something they were going to do.
Speaker ASo those things happen all the time.
Speaker AI got another one going on right now.
Speaker ACrazy.
Speaker AI sing, as you know, and I have lots of songs.
Speaker AAnd I've got three more that are ready.
Speaker AWell, they're not quite finished.
Speaker AI've got the two of them.
Speaker AI've got everything done but the vocals.
Speaker AAnd the third one, I have some music to do in the studio, still in the vocals, but the vocals have been a problem.
Speaker AThis.
Speaker AThis bug, that kind of thing, just won't go away.
Speaker AAnd so halfway through songs, you know, I did some.
Speaker AI work practice at least an hour, maybe two every day on keyboard and on singing for songs in general to get everything learned.
Speaker AJust won't go away.
Speaker AI don't know what it is.
Speaker ANot sick.
Speaker AAnd that bug in the throat.
Speaker AIf anybody's got any great ideas, get a hold of me and let me know.
Speaker ABest way to do that is that URL right there.
Speaker AKellenfluker media.com go there.
Speaker AHelenfluecigermedia.com use the contact form and tell me your brilliant solution for that perpetual bug in the throat, which I don't normally have, but I have had for the last several weeks.
Speaker AAnd that.
Speaker ARight.
Speaker AAnd I don't know why.
Speaker AAnyway, so those things happen and worse things.
Speaker AMaybe you have an existential crisis where you've been trying for a year or two or three to create a business and it's just not working for you.
Speaker ASo you wake up and you say, I'm dead.
Speaker AI'm finished.
Speaker AI can't do it.
Speaker AI'm just not cut out for this.
Speaker AIt won't work.
Speaker AOr maybe someone close to you says, I'm finished with you, deluding yourself.
Speaker AI can't support you anymore.
Speaker AMaybe it's your partner or your spouse or your business partner.
Speaker ACan't.
Speaker AIt's not working.
Speaker AI quit.
Speaker AHave you had that happen?
Speaker AI'll bet you have.
Speaker ARaise your hand.
Speaker ASick feeling in the stomach.
Speaker ALet's go vomit and then come back and talk.
Speaker ASo there's a lot of things to talk about.
Speaker AThese setbacks.
Speaker AAnd I titled today building resilience.
Speaker ABuilding resilience.
Speaker ATurning setbacks into setups.
Speaker ARight?
Speaker ASetbacks into setups.
Speaker AAnd that means set up for success.
Speaker AWhen I picked that word, I thought setups.
Speaker AI wonder if you know, like a criminal, hey, I'm being set up.
Speaker AThat's not what I mean.
Speaker ASetups that are good setups for you.
Speaker AAnd often when we talk about this, so.
Speaker ASo often people say, yeah, that's just a bunch of psycho babble.
Speaker AWe're just saying those things.
Speaker ABut it's not really true.
Speaker AWe're just trying to get ourselves in a good mood.
Speaker AWell, there's several parts to that one that is true.
Speaker AWe choose our frame of mind.
Speaker AAnd the reason it's important to know that is because when you're excited or I'm excited, I do better.
Speaker AI'm more excited about things.
Speaker AI'm more productive.
Speaker AI'm more creative.
Speaker ASo are you.
Speaker AYou know that.
Speaker ASo imagine, I want you to go think right now about the biggest setback or something you think is a setback.
Speaker ALoss of revenue, loss of relationship, loss of help or damage in any one of those areas.
Speaker AI was talking to somebody who I interviewed not too long ago here on the podcast, and they said something had changed in the world, something pretty significant and a place where they got, I think they said 80% of their revenue suddenly disappeared.
Speaker AImagine that.
Speaker ACatastrophic for them.
Speaker AIt's interesting because that's not the only person.
Speaker AAbout six months ago, I.
Speaker AI talked to A person who wasn't a client, but that I knew and that I had talked to periodically over the years just to keep connections going.
Speaker AAnd a coach in a different city, a different area, same thing about five months ago, because I think their feeling was that it had something to do with the election outcome.
Speaker ASo I live in Canada, but in the US Donald Trump got elected and that person blamed or thought that Donald Trump's actions in terms of either government efficiency or, you know, changing something had caused a significant loss of revenue for their business.
Speaker ANow, I don't know the cause and I didn't investigate it, but what I know is 80% loss in their business, also catastrophic, unexpected.
Speaker AAnd they were not prepared and they weren't doing a bunch of railing and screaming, but they were like, hey, what do we do now?
Speaker ASo this is the subject of today.
Speaker AHow do we turn those catastrophes, how do we turn those catastrophes into opportunities?
Speaker ANow we have all kinds of phrases that deal with that.
Speaker AYou've heard the story about the little boy that's led into a big barn and in the barn there's a big pile of horse poop.
Speaker AAnd the little boy, instead of being grossed out, dives into the horse poop and starts throwing it here and there.
Speaker AAnd someone asks him, what are you doing?
Speaker AAnd he said, well, with all this horse crap, I know there's got to be a pony in here somewhere.
Speaker ASo that was a choice.
Speaker AHe responded to enthusiasm with enthusiasm.
Speaker AAnd we treat that as some kind of a joke.
Speaker ABut I think there's a little more to it than that.
Speaker ABecause what we know from massive scientific research is that the energy we fill our hearts, our souls, our minds with has a creative power.
Speaker ANow if you believed that, if you really, to the core believe that, you'd guard your thoughts and your feelings like mad.
Speaker ALike you would if you knew that thinking powerful and positive expectant thoughts and taking action consistent with those thoughts would create the outcome you want.
Speaker AIf you knew that was true, you believed it and you knew it, you would guard those thoughts like crazy.
Speaker AIf on this, on the.
Speaker ABy the same token, if you knew that having grumpy thoughts, negative, self critical thoughts, I'm not good enough, it won't work.
Speaker AWho am I to do this?
Speaker AWrite a book or change my neighborhood, let alone the world.
Speaker AIf you knew that thinking negatively about that was going to guarantee failure, you'd guard your thoughts like crazy.
Speaker AAnd we do that, even though we have all read the books and seen the studies that say, as a man or woman thinketh, so is he or she like, we've heard that a million times and said all kinds of different ways.
Speaker ANapoleon Hill, think and grow Rich.
Speaker AOutwitting the devil.
Speaker AWallace Waddles, Science of Getting Rich.
Speaker AI mean, all of those books, methods, philosophies, talk about that.
Speaker AAnd yet we only half believe it.
Speaker AWhy?
Speaker AWhy do you only half believe it?
Speaker AAnd if you disagree with me, you're free to, you know, reach out to me and tell me you disagree and you believe it fully.
Speaker AAnd again, if you want to get a hold of me, there's the URL on the screen.
Speaker AKellenflukermedia.com use the contact form.
Speaker ATell me what you think.
Speaker AI make that judgment about.
Speaker AYou don't believe it because of how you.
Speaker ABy and large, I'm not talking to an individual here, but how we act because we act as if we don't believe it or we act as if it's true for somebody.
Speaker AI'm sure it's true.
Speaker AYeah, whatever.
Speaker ABut not for me.
Speaker AAnd that's not true with respect.
Speaker AThat belief is not true with respect to the negative side.
Speaker AWe believe that because we expect.
Speaker AWe express.
Speaker AWe say, my life's full of stuff.
Speaker AGarbage just keeps happening to me.
Speaker AHow come?
Speaker AAnd then we don't stop to think about how much we expect trouble.
Speaker AWe expect there's.
Speaker AWe expect things to go wrong.
Speaker AAnd by that expectation, we create them.
Speaker AThat's an interesting way and a truthful way to look at this.
Speaker AYet if you knew, or I knew, if we knew that we were going to create something terrible with our thoughts, man, we'd guard them like crazy.
Speaker ABut we don't.
Speaker AHere's a challenge for you, and I hope it's fun and revealing at the same time.
Speaker AI want you to stop 10 or 12 times today and think about your internal dialogue.
Speaker AWhat are you saying to yourself?
Speaker AWhat are you believing about yourself?
Speaker AIf I were to hear the deepest inner voice of your heart, what would I think?
Speaker AWhat would I know was true?
Speaker AAbout how much you love yourself or believe in your future or are exercising your creative power.
Speaker ANow, there's a one way of looking about, looking at this that I really like.
Speaker ASometimes we act like we're sitting in a movie theater and there's a projection on the screen.
Speaker AAnd the projection on the screen is.
Speaker AIs our life.
Speaker AIt's the scenes of our life.
Speaker AAnd we look at those scenes and react positively or negatively to those scenes and think, that wasn't fair.
Speaker AThat wasn't good.
Speaker AOh, that was great.
Speaker AAnd we act like we don't have anything to do with what's going on up in the projection booth.
Speaker AHere's another way to think about that.
Speaker AWhat if you and I, what if we are the projector and what's on the screen, meaning the scenes of our life, is what we are projecting.
Speaker ANow if you believe that, then the challenge is like I said 10 times, just listen to your inner dialogue and see what you're really projecting onto your life screen.
Speaker ABecause my experience is that that representation about being the projector is extremely accurate.
Speaker AWhat I think, what I believe, what I'm feeling, I'm projecting that out through my eyes onto the screen of life.
Speaker AAnd sometimes we object to that idea because there are so many things that go on around us that others do or say that we believe that we have nothing to do with.
Speaker AAnd, and undoubtedly there are things that are beyond our control.
Speaker AWeather and, you know, wars that start here and there.
Speaker AAnd we seem to be having a terrifyingly exceeding number of those right now, with who knows how many poor souls dying.
Speaker AIt just breaks my heart.
Speaker ASo we don't create that, but in the microcosm we do create our lives.
Speaker AWe invite experiences that are consistent with what we believe, the energy that we project.
Speaker ANow, I know this is not a new idea for you, but the challenge right now is let's say you're having these setbacks.
Speaker ALet's say instead of arguing with me, you simply say, okay, maybe the projections of my thinking, my belief are attracting to me magnetically these never these negative experiences.
Speaker AInstead of getting into an argument with me, some people say, well, I didn't want to get sick.
Speaker AI didn't.
Speaker ALet's set that aside for a minute just for the sake of this conversation.
Speaker ALet's say you do.
Speaker AYou set that aside and you say, okay, I'm projecting an energy that invited this kind of experience.
Speaker AI'm projecting a belief about myself, about my future, about my possibilities, about where I'm going.
Speaker AThat invited setbacks, that invited pushback from the universe and from life.
Speaker ALet's just for the sake of argument go there.
Speaker AWhat are our opportunities?
Speaker AOne opportunity is to argue and say, I didn't do anything.
Speaker AIt's just friggin not fair.
Speaker AThat's a legitimate point of view.
Speaker AI don't think it's very productive.
Speaker ACertainly hasn't been for me.
Speaker AAnother one is to just get curious and say, what, what am I saying in my private chambers?
Speaker ABecause usually that's the place, what we say out loud.
Speaker AIf you're saying things out loud, denigrating or dissing yourself or I suck, I'll never do this if you're talking like that out loud, you're already three layers into this, okay?
Speaker AAnd what I mean by that is, by the time you say it out loud, you've already said it inside and countless times.
Speaker AAnd on top of that, by saying it inside, you're creating, excuse me, the neurotransmitters of failure.
Speaker AThe neurotransmitters of sadness, of frustration, of anxiety, of depression.
Speaker AYou're creating that because of your internal dialogue.
Speaker ASo still going down the road of, let's say that our energy attracts these experiences from life that push back on us.
Speaker ALet's just say that that's true one way, and we talked about one way, but another way to look at that is, okay, we say sometimes, well, everything happens for a reason, and what doesn't kill you makes.
Speaker AMakes you stronger and so forth.
Speaker AAnd so then we can take the point of view of, okay, this is here so that I can develop more resilience or be a better person in some way consistent with the particular trial.
Speaker AAnd that is a better way than to be angry and blaming.
Speaker ABut it isn't the most powerful way because that, again, says, an externality smashed itself in my face and it's for my good, so whatever.
Speaker AAnd that usually is accompanied by some resentment and, okay, I'll tough it out through this.
Speaker ASomehow.
Speaker AWhat doesn't kill me makes me stronger.
Speaker AOkay, There's a even more powerful way to respond to this, and that is as a suggestion, that's this.
Speaker AI can't make you do anything.
Speaker AAnd I wouldn't even if I could.
Speaker AAnd I'll tell you why in a minute.
Speaker AA more, much more powerful way is simply to say, okay, this happened, whatever it is, IRS took all your money, your partner left you, you got sick.
Speaker AI'm saying big things.
Speaker AIt can be small things.
Speaker AKid got in trouble at school, had a flat tire, late to work, got fired, all kinds of different things.
Speaker AAnd just ask this question.
Speaker AWhat am I thinking?
Speaker ABelieving.
Speaker AWhat kind of energy am I doing that is drawing this kind of trial or difficult experience in my life?
Speaker AAm I boasting?
Speaker AAnd so, you know, there was a force needed to kind of make sure I didn't explode my own importance.
Speaker ANow, I don't know if there's somebody around keeping score, but it seems like balance is a big part of the universal laws, the laws of nature, equilibrium.
Speaker AAnd so if we try to brag, we're very likely going to invite some kind of negative experience to balance that.
Speaker ASo let's just play that game.
Speaker AI challenge you for the next few Days, anything that happens that's not what you want, that is, seems like a catastrophe or disaster, little one or big one, Instead of getting mad or instead of just sort of being resigned, just say, okay, that is.
Speaker AAnd if you're really going for the tough one, say, I'm grateful that happened.
Speaker AI love it.
Speaker AI love the fact that my bank account's empty or that I'm sick in the hospital right now.
Speaker AIt gives me time to think.
Speaker AAnd then say, I wonder what I am, what.
Speaker AWhat I can make out of this.
Speaker AWhat can I change that will pull me onto a life path, into a life energy, into a.
Speaker AInto a lifeline that doesn't have this, where I'm able and energized and motivated to add good to the world and create good stuff.
Speaker ASo I challenge you to do that.
Speaker AAnd I promise you, if you do, turning setbacks into setups for good things is not difficult.
Speaker ANow, I'm going to tell you a little story about just exactly that.
Speaker AJust last Christmas.
Speaker ASo it's.
Speaker AI'm recording this in May of 2025, and it's going to air in the end of June or first part of July, but I don't know when you're going to see it.
Speaker ABut five months ago, just before Christmas, on a Saturday, Friday, you know, Friday and Saturday that week, I started experiencing really severe lightheadedness.
Speaker ASo I would sit down or stand up.
Speaker AAnd I know if you stand up too fast, you get lightheaded.
Speaker AI know all that.
Speaker AI've lived a long time and had that kind of experience.
Speaker AThis was different and more radical, more severe.
Speaker AYou know, it scared me.
Speaker AAnd so it went on several times that week.
Speaker AAnd finally on Saturday, about four or five times, I experienced real lightheadedness.
Speaker AAnd one time, even twice actually, I passed out just momentarily.
Speaker AAnd one time I found myself, when I woke up, slumped against the wall.
Speaker AAnd another time I sat in a chair, and the act of even sitting down caused this.
Speaker AI, you know, came to with my head.
Speaker AWell, and it wasn't very long, and I wasn't going to do anything about it, but I told Joy, and she said, are you nuts?
Speaker AWe're going to go to the, you know, we're going to the ER to see what's wrong with you.
Speaker AThat's not okay.
Speaker AHow many times has it happened today?
Speaker AOh, five.
Speaker AAre you crazy?
Speaker AWe're going.
Speaker ASo we did.
Speaker AAnd it was interesting because instead of just dismissing me like I thought, well, they'll just take a look at it and see there's nothing wrong.
Speaker AAnd they'll tell me, you know, drink more, you're dehydrated or you're something, something, something.
Speaker AThey didn't do that at all.
Speaker AIt was quite a while.
Speaker ATwo or three.
Speaker AYeah, four hours.
Speaker AWe went at 5 or 6 o' clock to the ER and it was after midnight, one or two in the morning before I was called in.
Speaker AIt was quite busy and I wasn't an urgent case, meaning I wasn't bleeding on the floor.
Speaker ABut by the time they got me in and looked at everything, they decided, you know what.
Speaker AYeah, there's some here, something here to worry about.
Speaker ASo they kept me.
Speaker AThey wanted to do 24 hours of monitoring.
Speaker ASo they hooked me up to some gear and left me there for 24 hours all through Sunday and into Monday morning and, you know, took heart readings and all the kind of stuff they do for that.
Speaker AThat sort of occurrence.
Speaker AAnd here's the reason I say that instead of.
Speaker AAnd this is practicing what I was just talking about earlier, instead of asking Joy to bring me something to read, or instead of watching television, I decided not to.
Speaker AI didn't turn on the tv, I didn't do anything.
Speaker AI just decided to take that sacred space of about 28 hours.
Speaker AI slept some of it, but just to be with the Spirit, to sit with God and to explore the very questions that I'm talking to you about what is happening.
Speaker ABecause you know what my mission is?
Speaker AMy mission is to reach 300 million people with the message.
Speaker AAnd the message is, you are divine, capable and anything is possible, meaning you can create your life.
Speaker ASo I just decided to sit with that.
Speaker AAnd it turned what could have been either an angering or frustrating waste of time or something scary into a beautiful and glorious experience where I was very near to the Spirit.
Speaker AI felt like the veil was very, very thin.
Speaker AAnd I had a bunch of experiences that I'm not going to tell the stories now because it doesn't matter.
Speaker ABut the point was, it was the choice to simply love what is.
Speaker AAnd to ask myself, what am I believing?
Speaker AWhat kind of energy am I living in that would bring me up short, slap upside the face.
Speaker AAnd I had several clear pieces of direction.
Speaker AAbout three or four things in my life.
Speaker AOne was the pace that I was living at.
Speaker ATwo was maybe I wasn't quite paying enough attention to the body.
Speaker AAnd there were three or four concrete suggestions.
Speaker AAnd so there were some business things, some things with joy, some things in my life, and I don't.
Speaker AI would never have received those if I had been either frustrated or angry or resigned.
Speaker AIt was because I leaned right in and said, okay, let's, let's, let's just sit here with this.
Speaker ASo I share that experience, not to say anything about me, but to give you a firsthand personal example of something that could have been scary.
Speaker AInstead, I turned it into an inquiry, and it turned out to be glorious and beautiful.
Speaker ASo the point of today, I want to make several points here for you to take this away.
Speaker ASetbacks into setups.
Speaker AThat was an example for me.
Speaker AList three or four setbacks right now that you have had in the last day or week or month.
Speaker AMaybe your day's packed and you've had three or four in the last three hours.
Speaker AI don't know.
Speaker ABut list them.
Speaker AList them and ask yourself, what is the gift in each one?
Speaker AWhat is the gift in here?
Speaker AWhat is the possible gift?
Speaker ABecause it's always available for you or me to get beat down, to lay on the ground and say, I quit.
Speaker AI'm done.
Speaker AIt's not fair.
Speaker AI've had the crap kicked out of me.
Speaker AI've been busting my butt, trying really hard.
Speaker AIt never works.
Speaker AAnd we've all used that line of reasoning, and we know where it goes, too.
Speaker ANever fixes anything.
Speaker AInstead, ask, what's the gift here?
Speaker AWhat can I do right now to develop patience?
Speaker AAnd patience is not doing nothing.
Speaker APatience is not resignation.
Speaker APatience is not binging Netflix.
Speaker APatience is leaning in joyously and exploring the opportunity.
Speaker ASee, when unexpected things happen, we tend to get frustrated and mad that the laws of nature and the will, God and the actions of others didn't line up with our.
Speaker AOur chosen view of the universe, our chosen flow for this day or this week or this month.
Speaker AWell, one of the things we said earlier is maybe things are there's a possible growth opportunity.
Speaker AI can't find that growth opportunity if I don't fall in love with what is what if we say instead, These setbacks, as it were, are not even setbacks.
Speaker AThey're opportunities to learn to love myself more.
Speaker AThey're opportunities to explore my own level of resilience.
Speaker ANow, we've all seen the movies, read the books about people in difficult circumstances, starvation and wartime, and marveled at their resilience, that their willingness and determination to keep moving forward.
Speaker AAnd sometimes we say, well, they had no choice.
Speaker AYeah, they did.
Speaker AYeah, you do.
Speaker AEvery single time.
Speaker ASo I told you we were doing four parts about going from stuck to soaring.
Speaker AAnd this is the third one.
Speaker AThe first one was the hidden cost of settling why being good enough quote is holding you back.
Speaker AAnd the second one Was last episode.
Speaker AThe power of choice, reclaiming your agency, the sacred nature of agency.
Speaker AAnd this one is building resilience, turning these setbacks into setups.
Speaker ANow, in order for this to do good for me, at least, I have to not play games with it.
Speaker AIf I go, well, I guess there's supposed to be something good in here somewhere, so I'll just freaking pretend and do whatever and see what I can find.
Speaker AWhen I've done that or anything like it.
Speaker AIt hasn't really produced anything for me.
Speaker AWhen I lay down my insistence that the laws of nature work according to my yearning, when I quit fighting with reality and I simply lean in and say, this spirit, having a human experience, what can I make out of this?
Speaker AEvery single time I've done that sincerely and with real desire, it has been amazing.
Speaker AIt has changed the game in a significant way.
Speaker AAnd, you know, it's kind of like the word breakthrough.
Speaker AWhen someone says to me, how to breakthrough?
Speaker AHow to breakthrough?
Speaker AWhen they've said that 50 or 60 or 100 times, I used to find myself wondering, oh, come on, how many breakthroughs is it going to take?
Speaker AWhat are you breaking through tissue paper?
Speaker AWhen are we going to get there?
Speaker AI no longer think that anymore.
Speaker ABecause any sudden or gradual, but usually sudden insight where you realize you've been looking at life, your growth, your capability a certain way, and then you realize, holy cow, there's another mountaintop, There's a different way to look at this.
Speaker AThere's a whole different thing I wasn't seeing.
Speaker AAnytime we do that, it's so exhilarating.
Speaker AIt's so exciting.
Speaker AIt's so much fun.
Speaker ANow, here's some things I know about you and some invitations for you.
Speaker AI know that you're a divine being.
Speaker AI know that you have capability and power.
Speaker AI also know that you have a yearning to add good to the world.
Speaker ABy add good to the world, I simply mean live your life in a conscious, intentional way.
Speaker ATo be kind, to be of service, to lift, to love, to bless, like we are here.
Speaker ATo love and serve each other.
Speaker AMaking a billion dollars or getting greedy or having the biggest house or the best cars or whatever, Those are fun, but they're not our purpose.
Speaker AThat's really obvious, because how many people do you know that have all the material things they want and they're still not happy?
Speaker AThey still have the emptiness and still yearning and looking?
Speaker AWell, I know a boatload.
Speaker AI used to be one.
Speaker AYou probably do, too.
Speaker AHow many people do you know are living in the shadow of their dreams?
Speaker AAnd what I Mean by that is they have this year, maybe you, a yearning to have more, to be more, to make a difference.
Speaker AAnd yet when you look at your calendar and you look at your energy and you look at where you spend your time, your energy, your love, your focus, your cash, it doesn't line up with those lofty goals.
Speaker AI often hear from potential client or someone I'm talking to about a lofty or powerful thing they really want to do.
Speaker AAnd I'll ask the question, well, how bad do you want that?
Speaker AOh, I'll do anything.
Speaker AOkay.
Speaker AReally?
Speaker AYeah, I'll do whatever I have to.
Speaker AAnd so then we start exploring things that are going on, either attitudes or behaviors or habits that are in their lives that are absolutely and obviously in the way.
Speaker AAnd quite often there is a sort of rejection of that.
Speaker AWell, I didn't know I had to change that.
Speaker AAnd so what we're really saying is I want everything that I want to somehow be delivered with a magic wand and in an instant.
Speaker ALife was built to build us.
Speaker ALife is created to give us the opportunity to grow.
Speaker AThe cool thing is that nobody can force you to grow, or me.
Speaker ANobody can force you to develop your talents.
Speaker ANobody can force you to look at every setback as a beautiful opportunity.
Speaker ANobody can force you to do that.
Speaker AAnd the other side of that coin is no one can prevent you from that joyful experience.
Speaker AI promise you a couple of things.
Speaker AWhen you lean in and make the very most of everything that happens, I don't know why this happened.
Speaker AIt's not what I was looking for, but I'm gonna find a pony in here.
Speaker AEvery time you do that, your heart is lighter, your creativity goes up and you feel really good about yourself.
Speaker AYou get hits of dopamine and serotonin and all the rest.
Speaker ABecause creativity is fun.
Speaker AExploring is fun.
Speaker ACuriosity is fun.
Speaker ACuriosity is the seed of passion.
Speaker ACuriosity is the seed.
Speaker APassion is the fruit.
Speaker ASo many of us at maybe all our lives are at different times.
Speaker AWe want everything to be quick, instantaneous.
Speaker AYeah, I've had a setback and somebody come and take it away.
Speaker AIt is in the doing that we learn.
Speaker AIt is in the activity that we get better.
Speaker AI use a silly example all the time, but if I watch a YouTube video of someone that's in shape doing 100 push ups and I watch it 50 times, I don't get stronger, do I?
Speaker AAnd we live in a world where we think that everything digital should be quick and easy.
Speaker AAnd it's not real growth, never was.
Speaker AAnd by living in this world of not being Resilient.
Speaker AWe're losing the ability.
Speaker AWe're losing the ability to build, to push through, to develop.
Speaker AWe're developing the ability to complain, to grumble to right and to moan at everything and everybody else.
Speaker AWe're developing that to a high level of skill.
Speaker AAll you have to do is watch the tv, look at social media and talk about politics and you'll see no matter which side you're on, we're building great facility in arguing and smashing and degrading and everything else.
Speaker AHow about if we return to the ability to be resilient, the return to the ability to be self sufficient, to stop looking for some cavalry coming over the hill and instead look inside and say, what is my capability?
Speaker AWhat One step.
Speaker ANow I'm going to give you some strategies to do this in everyday life because it's easy to talk about stuff at 30,000 or 50,000ft.
Speaker AHere's how you implement this.
Speaker AEvery time you find yourself frustrated or angry, stop and ask, why am I frustrated or angry?
Speaker AAnd if the sentence starts because they or because that and it's outside of you, that's a trigger that says you're externalizing and blaming or I am and there's, excuse me, there's an opportunity to say, well, this is what it is.
Speaker AWhat can I create here?
Speaker AAnd smile.
Speaker AWhat can I create here?
Speaker AWell, you won't even know until you explore that.
Speaker ASo that is a daily activity.
Speaker AEvery single time you feel frustrated, negative, ignored, pushed down, unfairly treated or whatever, instead of responding, you know, reacting to it and yelling and blaming and sulking or whatever it is, simply say, okay, this is not what I wanted.
Speaker AWhat can I create here?
Speaker AIf you'll take that challenge seriously, I promise it will change your life all by itself.
Speaker AAnother strategy for cultivating resilience is make a choice to follow Einstein's advice.
Speaker AOne of the things he said is there's two ways to look at life.
Speaker AOne is that nothing's a miracle, and two, that everything is.
Speaker AI found personally that choosing to view everything as a miracle, amazing that could happen, is really powerful.
Speaker AIt keeps me in a good mood, it keeps me creating, and it keeps me in wonder and awe at you, each one of you.
Speaker AI choose every time I talk to someone to look at them as an amazing divine being and to just see what beauty and power there is and have our conversation from that point of amazingness and power instead of what can I get out of them or I'm bored and I'm multitasking or any other sort of energetic state that's 50 miles below, wonder and amazement.
Speaker ANow, here's the invitations.
Speaker AFirst of all, accept my love.
Speaker AI love you.
Speaker AIf there's something I can do to serve you, to lift you, to help you, let me know.
Speaker AI cannot read minds, but I would love to be of service if you want to get a hold of me.
Speaker AThekellenfluekeggermedia.com contact form is the way to do that.
Speaker AThe second invitation is like that one, and that is if you have a story to tell.
Speaker AI love having people on the show here to share your message of resilience and growth and overcoming.
Speaker AAnd believe me, in the interviews I've done, I've seen some staggering things that blew my mind and left me jaw dropping with the.
Speaker AThe courage of some of the people that I've had the blessing of talking to.
Speaker AMaybe you're one of them.
Speaker AI would love to do that.
Speaker AIf you want my help with anything, that's all I do.
Speaker AMy mission now is to reach 300 million people with the message of your divinity and therefore capability, possibility.
Speaker AYour circumstances don't define you.
Speaker AWhat's happened to you doesn't define you.
Speaker AYour past doesn't define you.
Speaker AThose are all things that have happened.
Speaker AAnd you have the choice right here, right now to go do and be whatever you want.
Speaker AThat's the beauty.
Speaker AThe past is in the past.
Speaker AAnd I don't mean we can ignore it.
Speaker ASometimes there's crap we have to clean up, especially if there's big things, but it's all clean up.
Speaker AI know that's not a word, so I encourage you.
Speaker ANumber one, accept my love.
Speaker ATwo, if you want to be here on the show or share something with me, you're invited.
Speaker ANumber three, if I can share your message, I'll be happy to do that.
Speaker AAnd if you want my help with anything, do the other URL here on the screen.
Speaker AWww.dreambuildrite.
Speaker Ait's.com is a challenge that I'm holding periodically, two or three times a year to help you tell your story, write a book.
Speaker AI found that there's nothing more powerful than the work it takes to organize what you've learned, the choices that you've made to get where you are, which is brilliant and wonderful, even if you don't think so.
Speaker ADoing that work, there's nothing like it, nothing substitutes for it.
Speaker AI know some things because I'm living them every day, that if you take that, take the opportunity to look at life through the lens of resilience, you'll be happier, you'll be more creative, you'll be more productive and you'll be able to make great progress in creating your ultimate life.
Speaker ANever hold back.
Speaker AAnd you'll never hold.
Speaker AOpen your heart.
Speaker AAnd this time around, right here, right now, your opportunity for massive growth is right in front of you.
Speaker AEvery episode gives you practical tips and practices that will change everything.
Speaker AIf you want to know more, go to kellenflueckegermedia.com if you want more free tools, go here.
Speaker AYourUltimateLife CA Subscribe Share.