From Self-hate to Divine Spark: How Jennifer K. Hill Transformed Her Life (and How You Can Too)

Ever felt so broken you couldn’t get out of bed? Jennifer K. Hill was there—depressed, lonely, running from herself. Today, she’s a global connector and healer.
This episode shows you how to transmute your deepest pain into unstoppable light.
Jennifer K. Hill went from hating herself so deeply she tried to end her life—multiple times—to becoming a world-renowned connector, speaker, and creator of tools that unlock divine purpose.
In this powerful, soul-level conversation, Jennifer reveals how the triangle of self-connection, connection to others, and connection to purpose helped her emerge from darkness. She shares the raw truth about stillness, intuition, giving yourself the love you crave, and how your story is someone else’s survival guide.
👉 Free tools: yourultimatelife.ca
👉 Connect with Jennifer at jenniferkhill.com
👉 Want to turn your story into a book, keynote, or business? Join the Dream Build Write It Challenge — next round starts Sept 29: dreambuildwriteit.com
00:00 - Untitled
00:07 - Introduction to Real Talk
02:30 - The Journey of Connection and Intuition
11:29 - Understanding Types of Relationships
16:02 - Exploring the Power of Listening
19:13 - The Journey of Self-Discovery and Purpose
27:07 - The Journey of Self-Discovery and Connection
35:01 - The Inner Spark: Awakening Your Divine Nature
37:04 - Exploring the Depths of Sadness and Healing
43:01 - The Power of Vision Boards and AI
Welcome to the show.
Speaker ATired of the hype about living a dream?
Speaker AIt's time for truth.
Speaker AThis is the place for tools, power and real talk so you can create the life you dream and deserve your ultimate life.
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Speaker AYou have infinite power.
Speaker AHello and welcome to this episode of youf Ultimate Life, the podcast created and dedicated to helping you create a life of purpose, prosperity and joy as you serve with your gifts and talents.
Speaker AToday, I'm blessed to have a marvelous guest, Jennifer K. Hill, who is magic and you'll learn all about it as we get going.
Speaker AJennifer, welcome to the show.
Speaker BThank you, Kellen.
Speaker BIt's a pleasure to be here with you and your audience.
Speaker ASo one of the things I like to ask first, and I don't want you to be modest in any way, is tell the audience how Jennifer chooses to add good to the world.
Speaker BThank you, Callan.
Speaker BMy favorite way to add good to the world is connecting people.
Speaker BI There's nothing that brings me greater joy than weaving the magic thread of connection wherever I travel in the world.
Speaker BAnd I'm very fortunate to get to travel a lot.
Speaker BAnd sometimes, Kellen, I don't even know why I'm going to a particular event.
Speaker BI'll pray, I'll meditate, I'll ask my higher self.
Speaker BSo source the universe, is it my highest and best good to go to Alaska, London, wherever I wind up going, if I hear yes, I get on the plane and then I surrender.
Speaker BAnd I just asked to be a channel and a conduit for connecting people and giving them messages, resources, connections that they need.
Speaker BAnd that's kind of how my life goes.
Speaker AWell, I love that and I'm the beneficiary of that.
Speaker AYou know, you've joined me to a group of people and I've met some more folks who you guys are going to see here in the coming weeks and months as we, as we move to the podcast, as we cross a thousand episodes here pretty quick.
Speaker AAnyway, so there's a thought that comes to me as you describe that, because that's a beautiful thing, looking for energetic intertwinement or entanglement that people need to have and show up for and stuff.
Speaker ABut that is a place that you got because of life experience and so forth.
Speaker ASo how did it get to be the thing that that's what your heart loves to do?
Speaker BIt was out of deep loneliness, Kellen.
Speaker BI hated myself.
Speaker BI certainly didn't like others very much when I was growing up.
Speaker BI didn't understand myself first and foremost.
Speaker BSo I call it the golden Triangle of connection is after decades of heartbreaking, you know, broken relationships, broken communication breakdowns in all different areas of my life, I did some deep, deep soul searching.
Speaker BAnd then I discovered the formula which I now teach people, which is connection to self at a deep level, allows for deep intimacy and connection to others, as well as deep intimacy and connection to your purpose.
Speaker BThat's everything I do in life, and it was out of survival.
Speaker BKellen, you know, I wish I could tell you some fairy tale story of.
Speaker BOh, I was just actually recording a podcast with another friend of mine who's a great guy you should have on the show, Jay Rosensweig, and he's a prolific thought leader.
Speaker BAnd we were recording one of my podcast shows for Super Connections, and he was telling me his childhood, and he's like, it was perfect.
Speaker BIt was idealic.
Speaker BYou know, I.
Speaker BOur doors were unlocked and everything.
Speaker BAnd my.
Speaker BThat was not my childhood.
Speaker BI was like the antithesis of that.
Speaker BSo I was running from myself, running from others, running from my fear, and running from human connection.
Speaker BSo after coming full circle, now back to myself.
Speaker BNow I have the capacity to share what I've been able to give to myself.
Speaker AThat is so profound because when people, you know, I.
Speaker AClients that want to accomplish more and so forth, often I tell them the first place is you gotta love yourself.
Speaker AAnd they don't.
Speaker AAnd that means everything that they put out is.
Speaker AIs an act, you know, it's something that's not connected and true.
Speaker ASo you gave three really pieces of stuff, I mean, good stuff in that triangle, starting with connection to self.
Speaker AWhat is that?
Speaker BThat's what I found myself asking the first 30 years of my life.
Speaker BWhat does that mean?
Speaker BI had no idea who I was.
Speaker BI would just constantly mimic other people, thinking that maybe if I mimicked others, then I'd be accepted.
Speaker BNope, look inward.
Speaker BAnd so for me, how connection to self looks.
Speaker BIt starts, Kellen, with silence, number one.
Speaker BThis is why so many of us are disconnected.
Speaker BWe wind up in unhealthy relationships, romantic partners, business, etc.
Speaker BWe're chasing the dragon of approval outside of ourselves.
Speaker BSo step one is get quiet, spend a minute, five minutes, 10 minutes, two hours, whatever you have time for every day.
Speaker BAnd quiet.
Speaker BThe noise.
Speaker BIt's like the old fashioned television screens.
Speaker BFor any of you who may have grown up in the 60s, 70s, 80s, or even 90s, we had these old TV sets, and if the antenna wasn't just right, you'd have steady static and you couldn't clearly see the picture.
Speaker BAnd that's the analogy I use of life is we have so much noise and static in our lives in the form of media and social media and opinions and outside, you know, friends and different things that are impacting our life and our judgment that until we get quiet, until we cultivate that inner stillness and can sit by ourselves and just accept ourselves, then we don't have the capacity to clearly hear.
Speaker BThis is good.
Speaker BFor me, this might not be as ideal the past.
Speaker BThis path will have more thorns and brambles.
Speaker BThis path might be a little bit smoother.
Speaker BAnd the more I've taught myself how to cultivate intuition, taught the coaching clients I've worked with and the thousands of people I've mentored over the years, it really comes down to that stillness, that quiet, tuning out the noise.
Speaker BAnd then that gives you that ability to hear that still, soft, quiet voice that you could call your soul, your higher self, whatever language you choose to call it.
Speaker BThat's the voice that's going to tell you who your soulmate is, what your dream job is, where your dream client's going to come from, the trip that's going to have the most ease and grace for you.
Speaker BI was just on about 30 flights in six weeks, and knock on wood, literally every single one was on time early.
Speaker BAnd I do that because I'll meditate every single day and I'll say, do I have permission to fly?
Speaker BIs today a good day to fly?
Speaker BIf my flight ever even is a little bit delayed?
Speaker BI think I was flying back from New York work last week, and I did hear my first flight would be on time, but my last fight would be a few minutes delayed.
Speaker BWe still got in relatively on time of 20 minutes, 15, 20 minutes late.
Speaker BBut, you know, when you start to do this, then you can see the underlying patterns and purpose of life and follow those patterns, patterns and purpose to your, you know, follow the rainbow or the yellow brick road to your treasure.
Speaker BAnd whatever that treasure is, it's inside of you, it's not outside of you.
Speaker ASo there's lots of that.
Speaker AAnd it's clear that this is a truth that you not only live, but teach regularly, because your ability to explain it and describe it in steps is.
Speaker AIs good, valuable.
Speaker AAnd so I just take a sec for the listeners to listen to that two or three times and learn the stillness and then inside that stillness and seek inspiration.
Speaker ATalked about learning to cultivate that voice of intuition, and you talked about the still, small voice.
Speaker AAnd I'm not sure why it's designed that way, but the outside noise, the snow on the TV as it were, is loud and intrusive.
Speaker AAnd that other voice, not always, but nearly always is a still, small voice.
Speaker AAnd unless we learn to hear it, it will be drowned out.
Speaker AAnd so I love that.
Speaker ALet's go to the next corner of the triangle, which is when you learn to do that, then that allows you to have connection to others in a deep, meaningful, useful, powerful, whatever kind of way.
Speaker ASo talk about that corner a little.
Speaker BYes.
Speaker BThis is kind of cyclical.
Speaker BI'm going to tie it back into the first part of the triangle.
Speaker BInner child work.
Speaker BAnd the reason I want to touch on this is because when you give yourself.
Speaker BSo step one, listen, Tune in.
Speaker BListen to yourself.
Speaker BStep two, give yourself the approval you need.
Speaker BStop looking to your friends, families, boss, colleagues, whoever, social media, for approval.
Speaker BGive yourself that love.
Speaker BThen you show up clean.
Speaker BKellen.
Speaker BBecause here's what happens.
Speaker BI don't come to Kellen with, as Jennifer Cahill, this blank slate.
Speaker BI come as Jennifer Cahill if I haven't done the work, wanting attention, wanting this, trying to, trying to take energy.
Speaker BAnd I think that a lot of what we see in the media and the news on social media is people trying to take energy.
Speaker BWhen you start off, and this is actually what Jay and my episode was about on Super Connections.
Speaker BBe of service.
Speaker BYou want to be of service.
Speaker BI show up to any call and I have no agenda.
Speaker BI just ask, you know, let me be a channel, let me be of service to this person.
Speaker BWhether it's a resource, a connection.
Speaker BStart off by being of service.
Speaker BIn fact, one of the most well connected guys in the world was speaking at a conference with people, thousand people, about 15 years ago in the Bay Area.
Speaker BAnd this guy at the time is up on the stage speaking in front of all these people.
Speaker BAnd he says, the number one secret to being really well connected is find out what people need and be of service in that way.
Speaker BSo if I go to you and I'm trying to get something from you, we all kind of go, okay, like you kind of find yourself getting back.
Speaker BBut when somebody asks questions about you, and it might not be many of you might be thinking, and I get asked this a lot, oh, I have nothing to give.
Speaker BI can't tell you how many times it breaks my heart when people say that, Kellen, we all have something to give.
Speaker BIt could be an ear, lending an ear and listening deeply for somebody who just needs someone to listen.
Speaker BMaybe it is a resource, maybe it is a connection.
Speaker BIt doesn't have to be a thing.
Speaker BIt could just be your presence giving your presence 100% to somebody could be the greatest gift.
Speaker BYou hear these stories of suicide.
Speaker BGod knows I went through it and tried to take my own life two or three times by the time I was 18, 18 by the time I was 21.
Speaker BAnd, you know, sometimes just listening to somebody and seeing them can save a person's life.
Speaker BSo you never know.
Speaker BDon't discount yourself.
Speaker BWhen I hear others say, oh, I have nothing to give.
Speaker BHow would I ever contribute?
Speaker BInstead, I would flip that question around and say, what could I give?
Speaker BAnd maybe even ask your closest friends, your allies, ask your favorite chatgpt, what could I give?
Speaker BHow can I be a resource to others in the world?
Speaker BSo, number one, do the work.
Speaker BInner child work, whatever work you want.
Speaker BShow up clean.
Speaker BLove yourself first.
Speaker BGive yourself the love and attention you need.
Speaker BStep two, go out into the world.
Speaker BAsk people what matters, what lights you up.
Speaker BAsk people about their hopes, wishes, and dreams.
Speaker BAnd either listen, be of service.
Speaker BSee if there's some way that you can contribute to them.
Speaker BAnd in doing so, we all have these.
Speaker BIt's actually funny.
Speaker BOur mutual friend Yasmina, I'm not sure if you've seen her TED Talk.
Speaker BYasmina Ellis has a fabulous TED Talk on this about the three types of relationships.
Speaker BShe calls it circumstantial, transactional, and exponential.
Speaker BCircumstantial is, okay, we're in the same class together or on the same plane, right?
Speaker BTransactional is I need a service, therefore, I'm going to purchase this service or product from you.
Speaker BAnd exponential.
Speaker BAs Yasmina so beautifully, eloquently explains in her talk, exponential is where we want our relationships to be.
Speaker BSo I consider myself to be really fortunate, Kellen, you included in so many of the wonderful people in my life that every relationship I have is exponential.
Speaker BI just don't engage like people who often get on a first call with me, and within five minutes, we'll be getting into the meaning of their life, their purpose, and what would really light them up and how to fulfill on it.
Speaker BAnd nine times out of 10 people will say, I never have these sorts of conversations.
Speaker BAnd my response is, I only have these sorts of conversations.
Speaker AI totally agree with you.
Speaker AI love that.
Speaker AI love that.
Speaker AI love that.
Speaker AI didn't mean to interrupt.
Speaker AYou finish.
Speaker BYeah, please.
Speaker BNo, that was all my only thought.
Speaker AOkay, well, so I.
Speaker AThis, this not having something to give people saying that because you.
Speaker AAnd because I practice what you're talking about so intensely and so purposefully, it's not unusual for someone to say, well, I. I I don't think there's probably anything I can do to help you, but, you know, could I, you know, and they'll ask it in that sort of depreciating way.
Speaker AAnd that does the same thing.
Speaker AI want to cry because it's like if you just ask somebody what they're about and you do what you said, listen, and then you just encourage them, wow, what a thing.
Speaker AAnd you listened well enough to actually feel that instead of just saying it, you will make their day.
Speaker ALike, you will give them love, acknowledgment, appreciation, Even if you can't think of a connection or an immediate thing, that energetic gift can often, oh, you just made my day.
Speaker AYou'll hear that, and then what that does for you is a person saying it.
Speaker AAnd I'm speaking to all the listeners here.
Speaker ALook, you'll realize you do have a gift.
Speaker AWho you are matters, and you can give that anytime you want.
Speaker AYou don't need anybody's permission to love or encourage them.
Speaker AYou can just do that because you said so.
Speaker AAnd so I just.
Speaker AI love that and finding out what people need.
Speaker AWhen coaches.
Speaker AMost of my clients are not coaches, but some of them are.
Speaker AAnd they say, how do I get more clients?
Speaker AAnd what I say always is the first thing you do is exercise your give a crap muscle.
Speaker AYou know you do.
Speaker AYou have to exercise your give a crap muscle and become someone who truly loves people and is looking for that place.
Speaker AAnd when you do that, the world opens up because people are hungry, starving in many cases for that feeling and truth.
Speaker BYeah, it's so beautiful.
Speaker BI love that.
Speaker BKellen, you made me think of something.
Speaker BRemind me.
Speaker BI want to introduce you to a friend of mine, Arthur Samuel Joseph, who's been one of my other greatest teachers.
Speaker BHe trained Tony Robbins how to speak, Pierce Brosnan, Sean Connery, and many others.
Speaker BAnd he helped me to own the power of my voice.
Speaker BAnd one of the other things that Arthur taught me, listening.
Speaker BI think if we listen at the surface level, we're going to miss so much.
Speaker BBut if we approach every question or sorry, every conversation from a place of curiosity and from what Arthur would call our deeper listening, it's from not putting place that we unearth something special.
Speaker BI often do.
Speaker BI've done retreats for corporates and executives and entrepreneurs.
Speaker BAnd one of my favorite exercises to take people through is a very simple exercise.
Speaker BWe start off, this is one of my other favorite techniques to calm the nervous system, regulate your nervous system and connect yourself.
Speaker BAnd stillness is heart focused, breathing by heart, math.
Speaker BSo when I'm doing this facilitation for people.
Speaker BWe start with heart focused breathing by heart math.
Speaker BI have people who are in groups of two sitting knee to knee with each other.
Speaker BAnd then we start off putting them in the heart focused breathing.
Speaker BAnd then we have them ask, one at a time, what matters to you.
Speaker BAnd the only job of the person listening is to listen for what's not being said.
Speaker BAnd the magic in miracles, Kellen, Every time I've taught this technique to people in group settings or one on one, what happens for people opens up and blows your mind.
Speaker BBecause people don't feel seen, heard, or understood.
Speaker BAnd the minute you can give someone that gift of being seen, heard, or understood, that's where the floodgates of magic open.
Speaker AThat is so true.
Speaker AI.
Speaker AWhen I talk to people about sales, and I'm working with people about sales, we talk about listening.
Speaker AAnd I'll say, you know, if you'll just listen with the way you're talking about, people will buy almost whatever you're selling.
Speaker AAnd the reason is because you're giving them a gift they can't get anywhere else.
Speaker AIf you just are there and you're actually curious.
Speaker AAnd it has to be beyond that surface.
Speaker AI had a friend that taught a class, and he.
Speaker AHe said, you know, there are people that you know, and when they start talking, immediately, your thought is, I wish they'd shut up.
Speaker AI don't want to hear whatever it is, you know, whatever like that.
Speaker AAnd that is the level of listening.
Speaker AAnd then he said, now I want.
Speaker AI want you to think about somebody in your life, mythical, real, whatever, where if you got to talk to them, you would come listening like every word was gold and every drop.
Speaker AMaybe it's a leader, maybe it's God, maybe, whatever.
Speaker ABut, you know, you would just show up like that.
Speaker AHe said that kind of listening is a choice, and you have a story about why you do whatever kind of listening you're doing.
Speaker AAnd so his invitation was to think about the kind of listening you're choosing to show up with and then watch the magic happen, which is what he said.
Speaker AAnd that's how he described it.
Speaker ASomebody.
Speaker AYou're just falling all over yourself, and you just be listening, right?
Speaker AAnd you couldn't wait to be there in every last second and every word.
Speaker AAnd that's what I thought of when you said that.
Speaker AAnd so that's such a fun thing.
Speaker AAnd we all know people like that.
Speaker AAnd we all know people like the other kind, too.
Speaker AIt's like, okay, you know, that sort of thing.
Speaker AAnd It's a choice was the magic.
Speaker ASo let's get to the third point of the triangle, which is so near and dear to my heart too, which is the, the idea, the truth that you have.
Speaker AYou, each one of you have a purpose.
Speaker AYou're here for a reason.
Speaker AAnd as the third point of your triangle, you said connection to self, others, and then a deeper possibility or stronger connection to your purpose.
Speaker ATalk about that a little bit.
Speaker BYeah, a couple tools.
Speaker BSo one of the things I love to do, Ellen, is I love to share tools with people.
Speaker BSome people are kinesthetic learners, some people are visual, auditory learners.
Speaker BSo one tool I like to help people and support them with their purpose is Gene Keys.
Speaker BAre you familiar with that tool by.
Speaker ARichard Redd Dream or Gene?
Speaker BGene G E N E K E Jean Keys?
Speaker ANo.
Speaker ANo.
Speaker BOh my gosh.
Speaker BExploding ahead.
Speaker BEmoji Kellen, for you and your listeners and audience, it's free.
Speaker BIt will boggle your mind.
Speaker BIt is probably one of the best free tools I've ever come across in my life.
Speaker BJust go to genekeys.com free profile.
Speaker BYou will go down a rabbit hole.
Speaker BIt gives you complimentary audio.
Speaker BYou can drop it in chat, GPT or your favorite AI, have it interpret it even further, but it gives you all this free data on the site and it literally will tell you your purpose is this.
Speaker BThis is your area of learning, of growth.
Speaker BNow, I want to be clear of why we have to do the other two first.
Speaker BYou won't be able to connect to others or to your purpose until you first get to know yourself.
Speaker BAnd that's what I love about Gene Keys is going deeper into understanding that now, taking it back to that deeper listening we were just talking about.
Speaker BOur purpose is like knocking at the door all the time.
Speaker BIt's like, hello, hello.
Speaker BActually, Arthur is the one who used to say this to me all the time.
Speaker BWe've worked together like 15 years on and off.
Speaker BAnd Arthur would say, jen, when you have like the universe knocking at your door saying, hello, I have something for you, it might be to be a mother or father, it might be to be an animal trainer like my sister is.
Speaker BIt might be to be a world famous speaker, podcaster, a thought leader like you, Kellen, there is no right or wrong purpose.
Speaker BBut you will not be able to hear it unless you tune out the noise.
Speaker BAnd then all of a sudden, when you start being of service to others, when you spend that time, invest that time wisely with yourself every day, that's when synchronicity starts.
Speaker BAnd then all Of a sudden, it's like the breadcrumbs to your destiny appear on the path and guide you divinely to the right people at the right time.
Speaker BEven if we make mistakes, which we do, we think, oh, I should have gone left instead of right, or I chose the wrong co founder, I hired the right person, or I dated the wrong person.
Speaker BThere is no wrong person.
Speaker BThese are all just breadcrumbs that sometimes meander us to our purpose.
Speaker BAnd I find the path is more tried and true and lined with synchronicities and miracles and magic.
Speaker BWhen you quiet the noise and are of service to others, that's, to me, the magic formula that then leads you to.
Speaker BAnd it'll be.
Speaker BIt might happen in a conversation.
Speaker BI have a couple of my best friends who are both working on their divinely guided businesses right now, and it was sometimes just sitting with it and being in the inquiry and not just trying to shove a round pig in a square hole.
Speaker BI think a big part of this that I also want to highlight and I've never gotten before until this moment, Kellen, is patience.
Speaker BWe're living in an Amazon Starbucks culture where we want to swipe left, swipe right, have everybody be delivered to our doorstep.
Speaker BAnd I think that this ability to sit and do nothing and then also to give of your time and yourself, those things cultivate a level of patience.
Speaker BAnd in doing so, that then allows us to wait in this divine sense of grace for the right opportunity at the right time.
Speaker BEvery time I have a deal I'm about to close, Kellen.
Speaker BWhether it's a new client, a coaching client, a client for our tech company, Optimatch, any sort of big business deal, I literally pray, meditate, I say universe, if it's in my highest and best good, their highest and best good, and humanity's highest and best good, then please remove any and all obstacles for all of us.
Speaker BIf for any reason it's not my highest and best good, their highest and best good, or humanity's highest and best good, then please lovingly redirect each and every one of us to what will bring us closer to you and to our purpose.
Speaker AI just thank you for saying that and saying it so clearly.
Speaker AI.
Speaker AWe do.
Speaker AWe have the ability, we each have the ability to be quiet and to tune into intuition.
Speaker AIt's not some special people.
Speaker ASome people have developed more and people maybe were gifted more.
Speaker AEverybody has their own powerful gifts and talents.
Speaker ABut you, individually, each of you have the ability, as Jen said, to.
Speaker ATo hear that intuition and to respond to those Knocks yes, you do, and please do, because that's where joy is.
Speaker AThe universe is not here to rip your head off.
Speaker AIt is here.
Speaker ASometimes you go through difficult paths and struggles, but it is for your development, and that's the meandering.
Speaker AAnd the mistakes we make aren't mistakes.
Speaker AIt is simply boundaries.
Speaker AIt is learnings.
Speaker AIt is opportunities for growth.
Speaker AIf you go to the gym and you lift, you don't.
Speaker AYou don't get more muscle without strain.
Speaker AI don't know why people don't get the fact that there's an energetic gravity too.
Speaker AIf you're working against some change in your heart and your life, there is a resistance.
Speaker AAnd it's just like the truth of the iron in a gym.
Speaker AThe larger the change, the more the resistance, and that resistance is needed, or you don't get any spiritual growth.
Speaker BI love that.
Speaker AYou know, I call it spiritual gravity, and I give a whole seminar on spiritual gravity and how it's an analog and we need to be grateful for it because it's consistent, it's predictable, and we need it, and it's not the universe trying to hurt us.
Speaker BYeah, I couldn't agree more.
Speaker BAnd it's funny you say that.
Speaker BOne of the greatest teachers I've ever had is a gentleman by the name of David Guillaume, who I had the privilege of studying with for about eight or nine years and mentored a whole class with him for a year.
Speaker BAnd he's now become like the next Joe Dispenza.
Speaker BHe's doing tours, and I just happened to see something from him on Social today.
Speaker BAnd he said, the reason your neighbors, your ex wife, your ex boyfriend, boyfriend, you know, children, whatever attack you is they're not attacking you, they're attacking your negativity and pointing it out to you.
Speaker BSo you have an opportunity to transmute that into something else.
Speaker BSo I was sitting with that today, and I shared it with my husband.
Speaker BI was like, wow, that's beautiful.
Speaker BSo sometimes we feel like our colleague, our best friend, whoever is attacking us.
Speaker BWhat if we shifted the lens of that, though, and instead said, what aspect of my negativity are they attacking to help me transmute and transform?
Speaker BSo that was from David Guillaume.
Speaker AI love the fact that you use the word transmute because transform means, as you know, changing the shape of something.
Speaker ATransmute is like alchemy changing lead into gold.
Speaker AAnd so when I talk about what we have to do, people ask me what we're doing when I'm working with them.
Speaker AI say, well, we're going to transmute the Fury of injustice, the ravages of adversity and the pain of loneliness into the pure gold of love, forgiveness and service.
Speaker AThat's not changing a form.
Speaker AThat is a transmuting of something.
Speaker AAnd I love that.
Speaker AAnd so you use that word and I'm like, oh, bless your heart for a cool thing.
Speaker AWell, that's a magical journey.
Speaker AAnd so what you've said, it starts with you love yourself.
Speaker AThere's a book I'm reminded of, Love yourself like your life depends on it came out of a TED Talk and the first edition was about that thick.
Speaker AAnd the thing on the front is a silhouette of a guy with a.
Speaker ALooks like he got a gun to his head.
Speaker AAnd there's a second edition that's a lot fatter and doesn't have that silhouette.
Speaker AThe first edition's fine.
Speaker AThere's nothing wrong with it.
Speaker AIt's beautiful.
Speaker ABut anyway, it talks about the story of someone who made a huge change simply by learning that first principle that Jens taught us.
Speaker AAnd from there you are inspired and in tune and you give yourself permission.
Speaker AYou don't love yourself.
Speaker AYou don't give yourself permission for anything because you're afraid of what others think or judging yourself or second guessing.
Speaker AAnd all this energy sucking garbage that you do.
Speaker AAnd you've talked about that.
Speaker AWe're just turning up the noise on the old TV's that static.
Speaker ASo I love that you called it that too.
Speaker ASo that's fantastic.
Speaker ASo you've talked about that set of triangles and as you do those and then move in this.
Speaker AYou mentioned two things.
Speaker AThe love you have of connecting people and resources together.
Speaker AAnd then you have another company, Optimatch.
Speaker ATell me a little bit about how you use this truth that you've explained so well in.
Speaker AIn either growing business or helping people or saving the planet.
Speaker AI mean we all know we.
Speaker AWe need a lot more of that, right?
Speaker AEspecially in what's with the world the way it is right now?
Speaker ATell.
Speaker ATell me a little bit more about that.
Speaker BSo two things I'm going to back up in terms of saving the planet because.
Speaker BShout out to a friend, Keith Hodges, who's actually in our tribe together, Kellen.
Speaker BKeith did a session for me.
Speaker BHe's a wonderful, profound energy healer and he wanted to thank me for all the people.
Speaker BI referred to him back in December of last year and it's.
Speaker BI love that you said save the world because I had had a reoccurring nightmare since I was five years old.
Speaker BKellen makes me feel like emotional just to discuss it.
Speaker BIt started when I was five, and I'd have to save a school bus full of children.
Speaker BAnd then as I got into my teens, I had to save the world.
Speaker BAnd I'd be floating on a piece of the earth, looking back at the destruction of Earth and oh, my God, I didn't save Earth.
Speaker BAnd this went on and on for decades, right?
Speaker BSo in December last year, Keith offers me a complimentary session, dead sober, 10:30am on a Thursday.
Speaker BAnd Keith and I start talking and he starts intoning and he says, jen, what do you want to work on?
Speaker BAnd I said, oh, Keith, I have this thing on my shoulder.
Speaker BI feel like I have to save the world.
Speaker BI've always had it.
Speaker BAnd he's like, great.
Speaker BSo he starts doing these intonations, the chance, the things to open up and do whatever he does.
Speaker BAnd I kid you not, Kellen, whoosh.
Speaker BI drop out of space in time.
Speaker BI don't know what this man did, but he did some powerful chance.
Speaker BAnd right away, I hear my higher self, the universe, whatever you want to call it, says to me, laughing, get over yourself.
Speaker BThere is nothing and no one to save.
Speaker BGet over it.
Speaker BBut what your purpose is, this will make me cry.
Speaker BIs to see the spark of light in yourself and the moment you've seen and found that spark of light in yourself and see and find that spark of light and reflect it back to every other human being you meet.
Speaker BAnd that is your purpose.
Speaker BAnd I was shown, Kellen, all of these beautiful sparks of light, the billions of sparks of light that are humanity.
Speaker BRather than becoming disparate, moving more separated from one another, they were coming back together to one original source.
Speaker BAnd the last part of that spectacular vision is I was shown this magical mirror vis a vis Disney, right?
Speaker BAnd as I looked into the mirror, instead of seeing my own reflection, I said, saw the faces of every human I had ever met or met or would ever meet and reflected to me as myself.
Speaker BSo that's been a powerful reminder.
Speaker BSo, number one, just in terms of saving the world, I'm always called to remember that we're not saving anyone.
Speaker BWe're just remembering the spark of genuine light that exists in all of us.
Speaker BAnd then that's similar to what ties into my purpose and what we do with Optimatch.
Speaker BSo after I sold my last company in 2018, my co founder of this new company, Julian, was my.
Speaker BMy business coach who helped me sell the last one.
Speaker BAnd Julian's a sweetheart.
Speaker BHe's a genius software engineer, human behavioral expert.
Speaker BAnd he said, jen, why don't we create an algorithm that mirrors your intuition for matching people.
Speaker BBecause at that point in the recruitment side, the first business I sold, I had literally matched successfully tens of thousands of people across many different, like, industries, a lot in the legal world.
Speaker BAnd he said, why don't we just bottle that secret formula up inside your head and then use it to help you humans connect with each other?
Speaker BAnd I said, well, shoot, can we do that?
Speaker BI'm not a tech person.
Speaker BAnd we did.
Speaker BSo we spent eight months developing questions, another year and a half testing it, and optimatch is now used predominantly in businesses and sometimes for communities and events.
Speaker BAnd we're even sticking our toe in the dating field with one called Soulmeat Love.
Speaker BSo you can try the normal one OM app, forward slash survey if you want to find out how you're motivated.
Speaker BOr you can go to Seoul M E E T. And that's something that we're also trying.
Speaker BAnd so my goal with this, Kellen, is that every human being gets to have the magic and miracles that you and I have.
Speaker BOnce you've done that work, then go out and play in this space with the people who you're like and going to feel natural affinity to.
Speaker BSo what we found and what I found in 20 years of recruiting is that if you and I are similarly motivated, Kellen, we're immediately going to feel psychologically safe, deeper intimacy, et cetera.
Speaker BThere's a way I describe it to people, kind of like a sine wave.
Speaker BImagine if Kellen and Jennifer are similarly motivated and you overlap our sine waves one on top of the other.
Speaker BWhat happens?
Speaker BIt amplifies the effect of that sine wave.
Speaker BHowever, let's imagine instead that you have Jennifer and Kellen on opposite sides, right?
Speaker BTwo separate sine waves in order to energetically match each other.
Speaker BI was just teaching a class on this to a leadership team yesterday.
Speaker BWe, the two sine waves have to exhaust a lot of their energy and resources to meet in the middle of where their motivators lie.
Speaker BSo that's been my life's work, is understanding what has us connect, what has us disconnect, and how do we create greater coherence and relationships.
Speaker AI just love that because I'm an audio engineer.
Speaker AI know the visceral and, you know, the sound consequences.
Speaker AAnd there's names for all that in audio engineering that excite like waves and same frequencies amplify each other and get louder and others tend to cancel.
Speaker AAnd all kinds of noise canceling headphones work.
Speaker AIt just takes a sample of the noise around you and Creates an opposite wave.
Speaker AAnd so it cancels the noise on the airplane or wherever it is.
Speaker AThat's how they work.
Speaker AAnd so you're.
Speaker AThe.
Speaker AThe idea that you are mo you and I or anyone, is motivated by a thing, creating a certain energy.
Speaker AYou know, we used to think of that as weird speak, but it's not.
Speaker AIt's the truth.
Speaker AThe easy way to think about it is you're in a room and someone walks in and you haven't even turned around yet, and the air changes and you know that they're frustrated or that they're really happy.
Speaker AThe energy is transmitted and those.
Speaker AThose waves are real and we can't measure them or do all that stuff very well yet.
Speaker ABut that is so true.
Speaker AAnd discovering that and then amplifying.
Speaker AIt's why two people can speak to the same audience.
Speaker AAnd one person will motivate a certain group or speak to them and.
Speaker AAnd the other person, another group, you know, and that's why.
Speaker AThat's why it's so important to understand that every person has a message and a meaning and nobody's going to save the world, right?
Speaker ABut we sometimes feel like we were supposed to.
Speaker AAnd what I think at least is when we have these times in our lives when we overcome something, when we go do some deep soul work and we realize that we're being healed or have healed ourselves or we're growing in some way, it seems like at that same time there always arises with that.
Speaker AThat yearning to help others, to serve others with that.
Speaker AIt seems to be connected.
Speaker AWhen we grow, it's like, oh, who can I help?
Speaker AThat seems to rise up with people.
Speaker ABecause when I interview people like this all the time, I say, why is this important to you?
Speaker AAnd they always tell me, well, it happened to me.
Speaker AAnd sometimes I'll say, well, why don't you just be happy for you and go away.
Speaker ABut.
Speaker ABut I can't do that.
Speaker AAnd so there seems to arise with that in us.
Speaker AAnd I think it's because it's our.
Speaker AOur divine nature.
Speaker AWe're built to love and serve each other.
Speaker AAnd your coherence and connection of all those points of light is a beautiful example.
Speaker ALove is an attractive force.
Speaker AFear, hate, all that other stuff is a repelling, divisive, negative force.
Speaker AWe can see that.
Speaker ASo being, loving yourself, finding your spark, reflecting that beautifully to others.
Speaker AWhat a beautiful description.
Speaker ASo thank you for that.
Speaker BThat's my pleasure.
Speaker BI feel very lucky.
Speaker BI've had beautiful meditations.
Speaker BI've done plant medicines and such in my life.
Speaker BBut the most Profound visions I've ever had.
Speaker BA bit sober and meditation.
Speaker AI agree with you.
Speaker AI had a guy I was talking to the other day that said, you know, he had never done this, and he was feeling really moved to go do a plant ceremony.
Speaker AYeah, I don't care.
Speaker ABut I had another client who'd done it like, 20 times, and every time he went to connect to the universe and everything, he came back with all this stuff.
Speaker AAnd.
Speaker AAnd then I said, okay, well, are we gonna, like, is this gonna cause some change in action?
Speaker AAnd it seemed like it turned into a crutch or a thing to go do from outside.
Speaker AAnd the truth is in you.
Speaker AThe truth isn't out there.
Speaker ASpark is in you.
Speaker AThe divinity is in you.
Speaker AThe capability is in you.
Speaker AThe love is in you.
Speaker AIt's not out there somewhere.
Speaker BYeah, it's.
Speaker BFor what it's worth.
Speaker BWhat David Guillaume, the teacher I mentioned earlier, who said the thing about your neighbors and attacking you, I love the way he put it in the Kabbalah class I was studying.
Speaker BI've studied Kabbalah for about 13, 14 years now.
Speaker BAnd David said, if you were to tell me you're never going to study Kabbalah or go deep into spirituality in your life, I would say, go do plant medicine.
Speaker BBut he's like, not having done it himself.
Speaker BRight.
Speaker BBecause sometimes it can be a catalyst, and we all might need that little extra nudge to see that inner spark.
Speaker BSo you can get there through deep spiritual work, bala Buddhism, other studies, whatever lights your, you know, spark, so to speak.
Speaker BOr you can also do something like plant medicine to kind of jumpstart it for you, though you can get to the same destination.
Speaker BIt's.
Speaker BAs I mentioned earlier, there's all these breadcrumbs that lead us to our destiny.
Speaker BThere are many paths.
Speaker BSome meander and have brambles, and some are beautiful rolling hills of green and fountains and water and fairy dust.
Speaker AWell, I love that, and I agree with you 100%.
Speaker AAnd, you know, I have always felt that the.
Speaker AThe.
Speaker AThe tools are in you, and if you need other tools, that's fine, but the tools.
Speaker AAnd I just.
Speaker AThe tools are in you.
Speaker AThe capabilities in you.
Speaker AYou matter.
Speaker AYou have this.
Speaker AEven if it's got layers of white noise on the TV over the top of it, it's time to turn that down and start where Jen taught us, which is at the.
Speaker AAt the place of stillness to start with.
Speaker ASo what else haven't I asked you that you would love to share?
Speaker AComes up for you, that would be like, ooh, that's cool.
Speaker ALet's do that.
Speaker BWhat I just heard, I feel deeply people's energy and how the audience is responding to this.
Speaker BWhat I just heard, Kellen, is, yeah, but I feel safe, sad.
Speaker BKellen.
Speaker BJen, I get it.
Speaker BYou're talking about things that are so far outside my capacity.
Speaker BAnd I just want.
Speaker BI want those of you who are feeling that way to know I've been there.
Speaker BI have been so inconsolable and so crushingly lonely and sad that I couldn't get out of bed, that I drank and I drugged and I was bulimic for a decade.
Speaker BI don't want you to think that you're broken or wrong.
Speaker BWherever you're at, if you're feeling crushingly sad right now, allow yourself to feel that way sometimes even doing the littlest thing.
Speaker BYou know, we were talking earlier about being of service.
Speaker BI remember when I first started studying Kabbalah, they talk about how to get yourself out of depression.
Speaker BAnd I've been depressed in my life more times than I'd like to count, really suicidally depressed.
Speaker BAnd the thing I know now is twofold.
Speaker BThat changes things for me.
Speaker BOne, that when we're sad, if we can do one act of kindness for another person, smiling, opening a door, getting outside of that self and, you know, going deeper and deeper into the loneliness, get outside of yourself.
Speaker BSee if you can do one kind thing, go volunteer, be of service to somebody else.
Speaker BAnd the other thing when it comes to depression is that sometimes we don't even know how to ask for help.
Speaker BHow to run up the white flag and just say, please help me is share.
Speaker BYou know, we all have one person.
Speaker BIt could be the person at the grocery store, we all have to eat right, or the Uber eats person who drops off your food.
Speaker BShare.
Speaker BJust share and say that you need help, because there's no shame in needing help.
Speaker BAnd one of the things that now helps me kabbalistically is I understand that we all go through different tests and challenges that are designed for our soul.
Speaker BAnd God forbid, you know, if we do choose to take our own life, which some people do, we get to come back and do it all over again, but harder.
Speaker BSo that's one of the big things that, you know, stops me now is I go, okay, I'm going to give myself permission to feel sad.
Speaker BAnd I choose how long I'm going to be sad for.
Speaker BSo before sadness would overwhelm me and depression would overwhelm me for days, weeks, months, years.
Speaker BAnd now when I get depressed or if I feel sad, I Still feel sad.
Speaker BI still feel lonely.
Speaker BI'm still human.
Speaker BThere is no perfection in any of us.
Speaker BNone of us can be perfect.
Speaker BWe still have human emotions and feelings, though.
Speaker BWhen I feel that way, I talk to it.
Speaker BI say, okay, sadness, what are you trying to teach me?
Speaker BWhat does that feel like?
Speaker BI was just doing an interview with another interesting guy.
Speaker BHe'd be a great guest for your show as well, Dr. Andy Hahn, who has a book called the One Hour Miracle, and he was sharing with me how he was treating depression, that he would have his patients go into that feeling.
Speaker BOne guy described it like oatmeal.
Speaker BYou know, like being in sticky oatmeal and, you know, figuring out what is that feeling?
Speaker BTrying to teach you, where does it come from?
Speaker BAnd the moment we can just be with the most difficult aspects of ourselves, of somebody else, of those feelings we don't want to feel, then when we can be with that without resistance, that's where freedom comes.
Speaker BThat's where suffering ends and limitless possibility begins.
Speaker AI love that.
Speaker AI had a friend that described something like that.
Speaker AThis way, if you fully experience the end, the outcome of any feeling that is fully experienced is joy.
Speaker AAnd what he meant by that is, even these sad ones, if you give yourself permission, I'm sad.
Speaker AI'm overwhelmingly sad.
Speaker AAnd I feel that.
Speaker AAnd ask the questions that you've just said, what is this?
Speaker AWhat is about?
Speaker AWhat can I learn here?
Speaker AWhat's the gift here?
Speaker AThat's the one I always use.
Speaker AWhat's the gift here?
Speaker AAnd I mean it when I ask it.
Speaker AIt's not sarcastic, because that requires a degree of surrender, which is I believe that there is possibility and there is a path here.
Speaker AAnd so rather than fight it or be mad at it, I'm just going to ask, what's the gift here?
Speaker AAnd sincerely look for it.
Speaker AAnd to go do something nice.
Speaker AIt's so easy on social.
Speaker AOne of the things I do in the morning is I go through in my creations.
Speaker AI'll go through whatever, Facebook messenger, WhatsApp or whatever, and I'll go through those, and inspiration will strike.
Speaker AAnd I will send people messages of love and uplift and maybe repair or acquaintance or something.
Speaker AAnd something about doing that does what you're talking about, because you're doing a thing, you're reflecting a spark or you're acknowledging a spark in someone.
Speaker BYeah, Beautiful, Kellen.
Speaker BAnd one other thing on the flip side that I'm about to share with the audience is one of my new favorite things.
Speaker BThere was something created by Glenn and Natalie ledwell called Mind Movies that was sold to Joe Dispenza I don't know how many years ago.
Speaker BAnd they had a software where you would stream together different images and then it would be a turn into Mind Movie.
Speaker BI think it still exists, I'm not sure.
Speaker BSo you could go to that website.
Speaker BAnd the way that I started playing with it a couple months ago is in March, I was like, wait a Second, we have ChatGPT and AI.
Speaker BI wonder if I could custom create images of my dream life and weave those into a series of images using canva or Chat or something and call it like my version of a mind movie.
Speaker BRight.
Speaker BWhere you would call it like a vision board, a moving vision board, whatever you would want to call it.
Speaker BAnd I, Kellen, it has been remarkable.
Speaker BI've done it for myself, myself, for my coaching clients.
Speaker BThe Results, the first 10 slides I created back on, like, March 15th, by, I think it was end of April, five of the slides had happened of things I wanted to create in the world.
Speaker BAnd so now I'm teaching everybody else how to do it.
Speaker AI love it.
Speaker AI remember actually when my movies first came out, it was Natalie and then some fellow that she was working with for a while.
Speaker AYeah, Glenn, way back, I think it was 2012 or 13, 12 or 13 years ago.
Speaker AAnd I remember them coming out and I actually bought one, bought a subscription to whatever it was then.
Speaker AOf course, the software has evolved at least 5,000 times since then.
Speaker AI mean, after all, 13 years is forever.
Speaker AWell, that's fabulous.
Speaker AAnd so I agree with that.
Speaker AThe mind movies are fun.
Speaker AThey're powerful, and they're fun to make, too.
Speaker BYeah, it's perfect vision.
Speaker BYou know, we used to do these vision boards.
Speaker BAnd I can't tell you how many times in my life, Kellen, I've created a vision board.
Speaker BAnd it was back in the day where you, like, rip out pieces of magazine and then stick it on, like a cork board or whatever.
Speaker BAnd now we can do that with AI.
Speaker BAnd so why not everybody, like, we spend so much time on social.
Speaker BTake your favorite images on social.
Speaker BBut, and I will caution you, here's a funny story about this.
Speaker BSo one of the images of the first 10 slides I created for my first movie was a private jet.
Speaker BI was like, ah, you know, I've flown private a few times.
Speaker BI'd love to fly private more.
Speaker BBut here was the funny thing because careful what you wish for.
Speaker BSo that exact private jet that was in my movie on the tarmac at sunset, I got on the jet, but it didn't take off because it was at a private event where they were featuring private jets.
Speaker BSo you have to be sure if you want to be on private jet, it has to be in the air, you know?
Speaker BSo think carefully about what it is you're creating and be nuanced about the literalness of it.
Speaker AI love that.
Speaker ASo let's.
Speaker ALet's make sure everybody knows where to find you.
Speaker ASo if they've heard you and you've given such moving and true and powerful stories and advice and help and encouragement, where can people get more of Jennifer Cahill?
Speaker BThank you, Kellen.
Speaker BI appreciate it.
Speaker BSo, one thing I would recommend again, you can go to jenniferkhill.com is a nice, easy way that you can connect with me there.
Speaker BI also write a weekly LinkedIn newsletter called Insights Inspired Living Tools.
Speaker BIf you Google Inspired Living Tools, every week a new newsletter comes out with some of my favorite tips and tools.
Speaker BAnd you can find an episode I did with Kellen on my Super Connections podcast.
Speaker BSo for years, I did a podcast called Regarding Consciousness.
Speaker BYou can still find those.
Speaker BI did it with Deepak Chopra and Don Hoffman and Bruce Lipton and Greg Braden and all sorts of lovely folks who are friends.
Speaker BAnd then I pivoted that one to one that we just had killing on called Super Connection.
Speaker BSo you can now find that one.
Speaker BIf anybody's interested, it.
Speaker AThank you.
Speaker AIs there any final thing you'd like to live leave with us from your brightness and your joy?
Speaker AAnd I want to really acknowledge you for sharing your soul, your tears, your heart, your love, the truth of your becoming and your being with us today.
Speaker BThank you, Kellen.
Speaker BI will leave everybody with a quote that I began a class with yesterday.
Speaker BThe world is not.
Speaker BWe don't see the world as it is.
Speaker BWe see the world as we are.
Speaker BSo ask yourself, what filter are you seeing yourself, your life, and the world through today?
Speaker BIf you don't like that filter, choose a different one.
Speaker AYou know, it's so profound to understand that we can choose a different one because we start with our lenses that we have, and we have this story that that's the only ones that exist, right?
Speaker AI mean, we do see the world the way we are.
Speaker AWe can't do anything else.
Speaker AIt's the only ones we've got until we realize you can take them off.
Speaker AYou know, that's the first realization.
Speaker AOf course.
Speaker AYou see the world the way you are.
Speaker AWhat else can you do?
Speaker AAnd the revelation is, I don't have to wear those.
Speaker AAnd that's the beauty.
Speaker AI love it.
Speaker AI love it.
Speaker AJennifer, thank you for being on the show today.
Speaker BThank you, Kellen.
Speaker BAnd thank you to your listeners and audience.
Speaker BI'm intending each and every one of you, maybe there was some little nugget, whatever it is may grow in you and may your spark grow too.
Speaker BAnd may you be able to see the spark in yourself and in those around you.
Speaker AI want to encourage you to go back and listen to this again, maybe some parts a couple of times or three times or five times.
Speaker AWrite down the names, the websites that she gave us because there's good in there.
Speaker AThere's gold in there for you.
Speaker AAnd you'll know as you listen what's for you.
Speaker ABecause if you do that and you follow your intuition, you'll be able to create your ultimate life.
Speaker ARight now, your opportunity for mass and grow growth is right in front of you.
Speaker AEvery episode gives you practical tips and practices that will change everything.
Speaker AIf you want to know more, go to kellenflukermedia.com if you want more free tools, go here YourUltimateLife CA subscribe, share.
Speaker BAnd your feet are on the ground.