From Self-hate to Divine Spark: How Jennifer K. Hill Transformed Her Life (and How You Can Too)

Welcome to the show.

Tired of the hype about living a dream?

It's time for truth.

This is the place for tools, power and real talk so you can create the life you dream and deserve your ultimate life.

Subscribe, share, create.

You have infinite power.

Hello and welcome to this episode of youf Ultimate Life, the podcast created and dedicated to helping you create a life of purpose, prosperity and joy as you serve with your gifts and talents.

Today, I'm blessed to have a marvelous guest, Jennifer K. Hill, who is magic and you'll learn all about it as we get going.

Jennifer, welcome to the show.

Thank you, Kellen.

It's a pleasure to be here with you and your audience.

So one of the things I like to ask first, and I don't want you to be modest in any way, is tell the audience how Jennifer chooses to add good to the world.

Thank you, Callan.

My favorite way to add good to the world is connecting people.

I There's nothing that brings me greater joy than weaving the magic thread of connection wherever I travel in the world.

And I'm very fortunate to get to travel a lot.

And sometimes, Kellen, I don't even know why I'm going to a particular event.

I'll pray, I'll meditate, I'll ask my higher self.

So source the universe, is it my highest and best good to go to Alaska, London, wherever I wind up going, if I hear yes, I get on the plane and then I surrender.

And I just asked to be a channel and a conduit for connecting people and giving them messages, resources, connections that they need.

And that's kind of how my life goes.

Well, I love that and I'm the beneficiary of that.

You know, you've joined me to a group of people and I've met some more folks who you guys are going to see here in the coming weeks and months as we, as we move to the podcast, as we cross a thousand episodes here pretty quick.

Anyway, so there's a thought that comes to me as you describe that, because that's a beautiful thing, looking for energetic intertwinement or entanglement that people need to have and show up for and stuff.

But that is a place that you got because of life experience and so forth.

So how did it get to be the thing that that's what your heart loves to do?

It was out of deep loneliness, Kellen.

I hated myself.

I certainly didn't like others very much when I was growing up.

I didn't understand myself first and foremost.

So I call it the golden Triangle of connection is after decades of heartbreaking, you know, broken relationships, broken communication breakdowns in all different areas of my life, I did some deep, deep soul searching.

And then I discovered the formula which I now teach people, which is connection to self at a deep level, allows for deep intimacy and connection to others, as well as deep intimacy and connection to your purpose.

That's everything I do in life, and it was out of survival.

Kellen, you know, I wish I could tell you some fairy tale story of.

Oh, I was just actually recording a podcast with another friend of mine who's a great guy you should have on the show, Jay Rosensweig, and he's a prolific thought leader.

And we were recording one of my podcast shows for Super Connections, and he was telling me his childhood, and he's like, it was perfect.

It was idealic.

You know, I.

Our doors were unlocked and everything.

And my.

That was not my childhood.

I was like the antithesis of that.

So I was running from myself, running from others, running from my fear, and running from human connection.

So after coming full circle, now back to myself.

Now I have the capacity to share what I've been able to give to myself.

That is so profound because when people, you know, I.

Clients that want to accomplish more and so forth, often I tell them the first place is you gotta love yourself.

And they don't.

And that means everything that they put out is.

Is an act, you know, it's something that's not connected and true.

So you gave three really pieces of stuff, I mean, good stuff in that triangle, starting with connection to self.

What is that?

That's what I found myself asking the first 30 years of my life.

What does that mean?

I had no idea who I was.

I would just constantly mimic other people, thinking that maybe if I mimicked others, then I'd be accepted.

Nope, look inward.

And so for me, how connection to self looks.

It starts, Kellen, with silence, number one.

This is why so many of us are disconnected.

We wind up in unhealthy relationships, romantic partners, business, etc.

We're chasing the dragon of approval outside of ourselves.

So step one is get quiet, spend a minute, five minutes, 10 minutes, two hours, whatever you have time for every day.

And quiet.

The noise.

It's like the old fashioned television screens.

For any of you who may have grown up in the 60s, 70s, 80s, or even 90s, we had these old TV sets, and if the antenna wasn't just right, you'd have steady static and you couldn't clearly see the picture.

And that's the analogy I use of life is we have so much noise and static in our lives in the form of media and social media and opinions and outside, you know, friends and different things that are impacting our life and our judgment that until we get quiet, until we cultivate that inner stillness and can sit by ourselves and just accept ourselves, then we don't have the capacity to clearly hear.

This is good.

For me, this might not be as ideal the past.

This path will have more thorns and brambles.

This path might be a little bit smoother.

And the more I've taught myself how to cultivate intuition, taught the coaching clients I've worked with and the thousands of people I've mentored over the years, it really comes down to that stillness, that quiet, tuning out the noise.

And then that gives you that ability to hear that still, soft, quiet voice that you could call your soul, your higher self, whatever language you choose to call it.

That's the voice that's going to tell you who your soulmate is, what your dream job is, where your dream client's going to come from, the trip that's going to have the most ease and grace for you.

I was just on about 30 flights in six weeks, and knock on wood, literally every single one was on time early.

And I do that because I'll meditate every single day and I'll say, do I have permission to fly?

Is today a good day to fly?

If my flight ever even is a little bit delayed?

I think I was flying back from New York work last week, and I did hear my first flight would be on time, but my last fight would be a few minutes delayed.

We still got in relatively on time of 20 minutes, 15, 20 minutes late.

But, you know, when you start to do this, then you can see the underlying patterns and purpose of life and follow those patterns, patterns and purpose to your, you know, follow the rainbow or the yellow brick road to your treasure.

And whatever that treasure is, it's inside of you, it's not outside of you.

So there's lots of that.

And it's clear that this is a truth that you not only live, but teach regularly, because your ability to explain it and describe it in steps is.

Is good, valuable.

And so I just take a sec for the listeners to listen to that two or three times and learn the stillness and then inside that stillness and seek inspiration.

Talked about learning to cultivate that voice of intuition, and you talked about the still, small voice.

And I'm not sure why it's designed that way, but the outside noise, the snow on the TV as it were, is loud and intrusive.

And that other voice, not always, but nearly always is a still, small voice.

And unless we learn to hear it, it will be drowned out.

And so I love that.

Let's go to the next corner of the triangle, which is when you learn to do that, then that allows you to have connection to others in a deep, meaningful, useful, powerful, whatever kind of way.

So talk about that corner a little.

Yes.

This is kind of cyclical.

I'm going to tie it back into the first part of the triangle.

Inner child work.

And the reason I want to touch on this is because when you give yourself.

So step one, listen, Tune in.

Listen to yourself.

Step two, give yourself the approval you need.

Stop looking to your friends, families, boss, colleagues, whoever, social media, for approval.

Give yourself that love.

Then you show up clean.

Kellen.

Because here's what happens.

I don't come to Kellen with, as Jennifer Cahill, this blank slate.

I come as Jennifer Cahill if I haven't done the work, wanting attention, wanting this, trying to, trying to take energy.

And I think that a lot of what we see in the media and the news on social media is people trying to take energy.

When you start off, and this is actually what Jay and my episode was about on Super Connections.

Be of service.

You want to be of service.

I show up to any call and I have no agenda.

I just ask, you know, let me be a channel, let me be of service to this person.

Whether it's a resource, a connection.

Start off by being of service.

In fact, one of the most well connected guys in the world was speaking at a conference with people, thousand people, about 15 years ago in the Bay Area.

And this guy at the time is up on the stage speaking in front of all these people.

And he says, the number one secret to being really well connected is find out what people need and be of service in that way.

So if I go to you and I'm trying to get something from you, we all kind of go, okay, like you kind of find yourself getting back.

But when somebody asks questions about you, and it might not be many of you might be thinking, and I get asked this a lot, oh, I have nothing to give.

I can't tell you how many times it breaks my heart when people say that, Kellen, we all have something to give.

It could be an ear, lending an ear and listening deeply for somebody who just needs someone to listen.

Maybe it is a resource, maybe it is a connection.

It doesn't have to be a thing.

It could just be your presence giving your presence 100% to somebody could be the greatest gift.

You hear these stories of suicide.

God knows I went through it and tried to take my own life two or three times by the time I was 18, 18 by the time I was 21.

And, you know, sometimes just listening to somebody and seeing them can save a person's life.

So you never know.

Don't discount yourself.

When I hear others say, oh, I have nothing to give.

How would I ever contribute?

Instead, I would flip that question around and say, what could I give?

And maybe even ask your closest friends, your allies, ask your favorite chatgpt, what could I give?

How can I be a resource to others in the world?

So, number one, do the work.

Inner child work, whatever work you want.

Show up clean.

Love yourself first.

Give yourself the love and attention you need.

Step two, go out into the world.

Ask people what matters, what lights you up.

Ask people about their hopes, wishes, and dreams.

And either listen, be of service.

See if there's some way that you can contribute to them.

And in doing so, we all have these.

It's actually funny.

Our mutual friend Yasmina, I'm not sure if you've seen her TED Talk.

Yasmina Ellis has a fabulous TED Talk on this about the three types of relationships.

She calls it circumstantial, transactional, and exponential.

Circumstantial is, okay, we're in the same class together or on the same plane, right?

Transactional is I need a service, therefore, I'm going to purchase this service or product from you.

And exponential.

As Yasmina so beautifully, eloquently explains in her talk, exponential is where we want our relationships to be.

So I consider myself to be really fortunate, Kellen, you included in so many of the wonderful people in my life that every relationship I have is exponential.

I just don't engage like people who often get on a first call with me, and within five minutes, we'll be getting into the meaning of their life, their purpose, and what would really light them up and how to fulfill on it.

And nine times out of 10 people will say, I never have these sorts of conversations.

And my response is, I only have these sorts of conversations.

I totally agree with you.

I love that.

I love that.

I love that.

I didn't mean to interrupt.

You finish.

Yeah, please.

No, that was all my only thought.

Okay, well, so I.

This, this not having something to give people saying that because you.

And because I practice what you're talking about so intensely and so purposefully, it's not unusual for someone to say, well, I. I I don't think there's probably anything I can do to help you, but, you know, could I, you know, and they'll ask it in that sort of depreciating way.

And that does the same thing.

I want to cry because it's like if you just ask somebody what they're about and you do what you said, listen, and then you just encourage them, wow, what a thing.

And you listened well enough to actually feel that instead of just saying it, you will make their day.

Like, you will give them love, acknowledgment, appreciation, Even if you can't think of a connection or an immediate thing, that energetic gift can often, oh, you just made my day.

You'll hear that, and then what that does for you is a person saying it.

And I'm speaking to all the listeners here.

Look, you'll realize you do have a gift.

Who you are matters, and you can give that anytime you want.

You don't need anybody's permission to love or encourage them.

You can just do that because you said so.

And so I just.

I love that and finding out what people need.

When coaches.

Most of my clients are not coaches, but some of them are.

And they say, how do I get more clients?

And what I say always is the first thing you do is exercise your give a crap muscle.

You know you do.

You have to exercise your give a crap muscle and become someone who truly loves people and is looking for that place.

And when you do that, the world opens up because people are hungry, starving in many cases for that feeling and truth.

Yeah, it's so beautiful.

I love that.

Kellen, you made me think of something.

Remind me.

I want to introduce you to a friend of mine, Arthur Samuel Joseph, who's been one of my other greatest teachers.

He trained Tony Robbins how to speak, Pierce Brosnan, Sean Connery, and many others.

And he helped me to own the power of my voice.

And one of the other things that Arthur taught me, listening.

I think if we listen at the surface level, we're going to miss so much.

But if we approach every question or sorry, every conversation from a place of curiosity and from what Arthur would call our deeper listening, it's from not putting place that we unearth something special.

I often do.

I've done retreats for corporates and executives and entrepreneurs.

And one of my favorite exercises to take people through is a very simple exercise.

We start off, this is one of my other favorite techniques to calm the nervous system, regulate your nervous system and connect yourself.

And stillness is heart focused, breathing by heart, math.

So when I'm doing this facilitation for people.

We start with heart focused breathing by heart math.

I have people who are in groups of two sitting knee to knee with each other.

And then we start off putting them in the heart focused breathing.

And then we have them ask, one at a time, what matters to you.

And the only job of the person listening is to listen for what's not being said.

And the magic in miracles, Kellen, Every time I've taught this technique to people in group settings or one on one, what happens for people opens up and blows your mind.

Because people don't feel seen, heard, or understood.

And the minute you can give someone that gift of being seen, heard, or understood, that's where the floodgates of magic open.

That is so true.

I.

When I talk to people about sales, and I'm working with people about sales, we talk about listening.

And I'll say, you know, if you'll just listen with the way you're talking about, people will buy almost whatever you're selling.

And the reason is because you're giving them a gift they can't get anywhere else.

If you just are there and you're actually curious.

And it has to be beyond that surface.

I had a friend that taught a class, and he.

He said, you know, there are people that you know, and when they start talking, immediately, your thought is, I wish they'd shut up.

I don't want to hear whatever it is, you know, whatever like that.

And that is the level of listening.

And then he said, now I want.

I want you to think about somebody in your life, mythical, real, whatever, where if you got to talk to them, you would come listening like every word was gold and every drop.

Maybe it's a leader, maybe it's God, maybe, whatever.

But, you know, you would just show up like that.

He said that kind of listening is a choice, and you have a story about why you do whatever kind of listening you're doing.

And so his invitation was to think about the kind of listening you're choosing to show up with and then watch the magic happen, which is what he said.

And that's how he described it.

Somebody.

You're just falling all over yourself, and you just be listening, right?

And you couldn't wait to be there in every last second and every word.

And that's what I thought of when you said that.

And so that's such a fun thing.

And we all know people like that.

And we all know people like the other kind, too.

It's like, okay, you know, that sort of thing.

And It's a choice was the magic.

So let's get to the third point of the triangle, which is so near and dear to my heart too, which is the, the idea, the truth that you have.

You, each one of you have a purpose.

You're here for a reason.

And as the third point of your triangle, you said connection to self, others, and then a deeper possibility or stronger connection to your purpose.

Talk about that a little bit.

Yeah, a couple tools.

So one of the things I love to do, Ellen, is I love to share tools with people.

Some people are kinesthetic learners, some people are visual, auditory learners.

So one tool I like to help people and support them with their purpose is Gene Keys.

Are you familiar with that tool by.

Richard Redd Dream or Gene?

Gene G E N E K E Jean Keys?

No.

No.

Oh my gosh.

Exploding ahead.

Emoji Kellen, for you and your listeners and audience, it's free.

It will boggle your mind.

It is probably one of the best free tools I've ever come across in my life.

Just go to genekeys.com free profile.

You will go down a rabbit hole.

It gives you complimentary audio.

You can drop it in chat, GPT or your favorite AI, have it interpret it even further, but it gives you all this free data on the site and it literally will tell you your purpose is this.

This is your area of learning, of growth.

Now, I want to be clear of why we have to do the other two first.

You won't be able to connect to others or to your purpose until you first get to know yourself.

And that's what I love about Gene Keys is going deeper into understanding that now, taking it back to that deeper listening we were just talking about.

Our purpose is like knocking at the door all the time.

It's like, hello, hello.

Actually, Arthur is the one who used to say this to me all the time.

We've worked together like 15 years on and off.

And Arthur would say, jen, when you have like the universe knocking at your door saying, hello, I have something for you, it might be to be a mother or father, it might be to be an animal trainer like my sister is.

It might be to be a world famous speaker, podcaster, a thought leader like you, Kellen, there is no right or wrong purpose.

But you will not be able to hear it unless you tune out the noise.

And then all of a sudden, when you start being of service to others, when you spend that time, invest that time wisely with yourself every day, that's when synchronicity starts.

And then all Of a sudden, it's like the breadcrumbs to your destiny appear on the path and guide you divinely to the right people at the right time.

Even if we make mistakes, which we do, we think, oh, I should have gone left instead of right, or I chose the wrong co founder, I hired the right person, or I dated the wrong person.

There is no wrong person.

These are all just breadcrumbs that sometimes meander us to our purpose.

And I find the path is more tried and true and lined with synchronicities and miracles and magic.

When you quiet the noise and are of service to others, that's, to me, the magic formula that then leads you to.

And it'll be.

It might happen in a conversation.

I have a couple of my best friends who are both working on their divinely guided businesses right now, and it was sometimes just sitting with it and being in the inquiry and not just trying to shove a round pig in a square hole.

I think a big part of this that I also want to highlight and I've never gotten before until this moment, Kellen, is patience.

We're living in an Amazon Starbucks culture where we want to swipe left, swipe right, have everybody be delivered to our doorstep.

And I think that this ability to sit and do nothing and then also to give of your time and yourself, those things cultivate a level of patience.

And in doing so, that then allows us to wait in this divine sense of grace for the right opportunity at the right time.

Every time I have a deal I'm about to close, Kellen.

Whether it's a new client, a coaching client, a client for our tech company, Optimatch, any sort of big business deal, I literally pray, meditate, I say universe, if it's in my highest and best good, their highest and best good, and humanity's highest and best good, then please remove any and all obstacles for all of us.

If for any reason it's not my highest and best good, their highest and best good, or humanity's highest and best good, then please lovingly redirect each and every one of us to what will bring us closer to you and to our purpose.

I just thank you for saying that and saying it so clearly.

I.

We do.

We have the ability, we each have the ability to be quiet and to tune into intuition.

It's not some special people.

Some people have developed more and people maybe were gifted more.

Everybody has their own powerful gifts and talents.

But you, individually, each of you have the ability, as Jen said, to.

To hear that intuition and to respond to those Knocks yes, you do, and please do, because that's where joy is.

The universe is not here to rip your head off.

It is here.

Sometimes you go through difficult paths and struggles, but it is for your development, and that's the meandering.

And the mistakes we make aren't mistakes.

It is simply boundaries.

It is learnings.

It is opportunities for growth.

If you go to the gym and you lift, you don't.

You don't get more muscle without strain.

I don't know why people don't get the fact that there's an energetic gravity too.

If you're working against some change in your heart and your life, there is a resistance.

And it's just like the truth of the iron in a gym.

The larger the change, the more the resistance, and that resistance is needed, or you don't get any spiritual growth.

I love that.

You know, I call it spiritual gravity, and I give a whole seminar on spiritual gravity and how it's an analog and we need to be grateful for it because it's consistent, it's predictable, and we need it, and it's not the universe trying to hurt us.

Yeah, I couldn't agree more.

And it's funny you say that.

One of the greatest teachers I've ever had is a gentleman by the name of David Guillaume, who I had the privilege of studying with for about eight or nine years and mentored a whole class with him for a year.

And he's now become like the next Joe Dispenza.

He's doing tours, and I just happened to see something from him on Social today.

And he said, the reason your neighbors, your ex wife, your ex boyfriend, boyfriend, you know, children, whatever attack you is they're not attacking you, they're attacking your negativity and pointing it out to you.

So you have an opportunity to transmute that into something else.

So I was sitting with that today, and I shared it with my husband.

I was like, wow, that's beautiful.

So sometimes we feel like our colleague, our best friend, whoever is attacking us.

What if we shifted the lens of that, though, and instead said, what aspect of my negativity are they attacking to help me transmute and transform?

So that was from David Guillaume.

I love the fact that you use the word transmute because transform means, as you know, changing the shape of something.

Transmute is like alchemy changing lead into gold.

And so when I talk about what we have to do, people ask me what we're doing when I'm working with them.

I say, well, we're going to transmute the Fury of injustice, the ravages of adversity and the pain of loneliness into the pure gold of love, forgiveness and service.

That's not changing a form.

That is a transmuting of something.

And I love that.

And so you use that word and I'm like, oh, bless your heart for a cool thing.

Well, that's a magical journey.

And so what you've said, it starts with you love yourself.

There's a book I'm reminded of, Love yourself like your life depends on it came out of a TED Talk and the first edition was about that thick.

And the thing on the front is a silhouette of a guy with a.

Looks like he got a gun to his head.

And there's a second edition that's a lot fatter and doesn't have that silhouette.

The first edition's fine.

There's nothing wrong with it.

It's beautiful.

But anyway, it talks about the story of someone who made a huge change simply by learning that first principle that Jens taught us.

And from there you are inspired and in tune and you give yourself permission.

You don't love yourself.

You don't give yourself permission for anything because you're afraid of what others think or judging yourself or second guessing.

And all this energy sucking garbage that you do.

And you've talked about that.

We're just turning up the noise on the old TV's that static.

So I love that you called it that too.

So that's fantastic.

So you've talked about that set of triangles and as you do those and then move in this.

You mentioned two things.

The love you have of connecting people and resources together.

And then you have another company, Optimatch.

Tell me a little bit about how you use this truth that you've explained so well in.

In either growing business or helping people or saving the planet.

I mean we all know we.

We need a lot more of that, right?

Especially in what's with the world the way it is right now?

Tell.

Tell me a little bit more about that.

So two things I'm going to back up in terms of saving the planet because.

Shout out to a friend, Keith Hodges, who's actually in our tribe together, Kellen.

Keith did a session for me.

He's a wonderful, profound energy healer and he wanted to thank me for all the people.

I referred to him back in December of last year and it's.

I love that you said save the world because I had had a reoccurring nightmare since I was five years old.

Kellen makes me feel like emotional just to discuss it.

It started when I was five, and I'd have to save a school bus full of children.

And then as I got into my teens, I had to save the world.

And I'd be floating on a piece of the earth, looking back at the destruction of Earth and oh, my God, I didn't save Earth.

And this went on and on for decades, right?

So in December last year, Keith offers me a complimentary session, dead sober, 10:30am on a Thursday.

And Keith and I start talking and he starts intoning and he says, jen, what do you want to work on?

And I said, oh, Keith, I have this thing on my shoulder.

I feel like I have to save the world.

I've always had it.

And he's like, great.

So he starts doing these intonations, the chance, the things to open up and do whatever he does.

And I kid you not, Kellen, whoosh.

I drop out of space in time.

I don't know what this man did, but he did some powerful chance.

And right away, I hear my higher self, the universe, whatever you want to call it, says to me, laughing, get over yourself.

There is nothing and no one to save.

Get over it.

But what your purpose is, this will make me cry.

Is to see the spark of light in yourself and the moment you've seen and found that spark of light in yourself and see and find that spark of light and reflect it back to every other human being you meet.

And that is your purpose.

And I was shown, Kellen, all of these beautiful sparks of light, the billions of sparks of light that are humanity.

Rather than becoming disparate, moving more separated from one another, they were coming back together to one original source.

And the last part of that spectacular vision is I was shown this magical mirror vis a vis Disney, right?

And as I looked into the mirror, instead of seeing my own reflection, I said, saw the faces of every human I had ever met or met or would ever meet and reflected to me as myself.

So that's been a powerful reminder.

So, number one, just in terms of saving the world, I'm always called to remember that we're not saving anyone.

We're just remembering the spark of genuine light that exists in all of us.

And then that's similar to what ties into my purpose and what we do with Optimatch.

So after I sold my last company in 2018, my co founder of this new company, Julian, was my.

My business coach who helped me sell the last one.

And Julian's a sweetheart.

He's a genius software engineer, human behavioral expert.

And he said, jen, why don't we create an algorithm that mirrors your intuition for matching people.

Because at that point in the recruitment side, the first business I sold, I had literally matched successfully tens of thousands of people across many different, like, industries, a lot in the legal world.

And he said, why don't we just bottle that secret formula up inside your head and then use it to help you humans connect with each other?

And I said, well, shoot, can we do that?

I'm not a tech person.

And we did.

So we spent eight months developing questions, another year and a half testing it, and optimatch is now used predominantly in businesses and sometimes for communities and events.

And we're even sticking our toe in the dating field with one called Soulmeat Love.

So you can try the normal one OM app, forward slash survey if you want to find out how you're motivated.

Or you can go to Seoul M E E T. And that's something that we're also trying.

And so my goal with this, Kellen, is that every human being gets to have the magic and miracles that you and I have.

Once you've done that work, then go out and play in this space with the people who you're like and going to feel natural affinity to.

So what we found and what I found in 20 years of recruiting is that if you and I are similarly motivated, Kellen, we're immediately going to feel psychologically safe, deeper intimacy, et cetera.

There's a way I describe it to people, kind of like a sine wave.

Imagine if Kellen and Jennifer are similarly motivated and you overlap our sine waves one on top of the other.

What happens?

It amplifies the effect of that sine wave.

However, let's imagine instead that you have Jennifer and Kellen on opposite sides, right?

Two separate sine waves in order to energetically match each other.

I was just teaching a class on this to a leadership team yesterday.

We, the two sine waves have to exhaust a lot of their energy and resources to meet in the middle of where their motivators lie.

So that's been my life's work, is understanding what has us connect, what has us disconnect, and how do we create greater coherence and relationships.

I just love that because I'm an audio engineer.

I know the visceral and, you know, the sound consequences.

And there's names for all that in audio engineering that excite like waves and same frequencies amplify each other and get louder and others tend to cancel.

And all kinds of noise canceling headphones work.

It just takes a sample of the noise around you and Creates an opposite wave.

And so it cancels the noise on the airplane or wherever it is.

That's how they work.

And so you're.

The.

The idea that you are mo you and I or anyone, is motivated by a thing, creating a certain energy.

You know, we used to think of that as weird speak, but it's not.

It's the truth.

The easy way to think about it is you're in a room and someone walks in and you haven't even turned around yet, and the air changes and you know that they're frustrated or that they're really happy.

The energy is transmitted and those.

Those waves are real and we can't measure them or do all that stuff very well yet.

But that is so true.

And discovering that and then amplifying.

It's why two people can speak to the same audience.

And one person will motivate a certain group or speak to them and.

And the other person, another group, you know, and that's why.

That's why it's so important to understand that every person has a message and a meaning and nobody's going to save the world, right?

But we sometimes feel like we were supposed to.

And what I think at least is when we have these times in our lives when we overcome something, when we go do some deep soul work and we realize that we're being healed or have healed ourselves or we're growing in some way, it seems like at that same time there always arises with that.

That yearning to help others, to serve others with that.

It seems to be connected.

When we grow, it's like, oh, who can I help?

That seems to rise up with people.

Because when I interview people like this all the time, I say, why is this important to you?

And they always tell me, well, it happened to me.

And sometimes I'll say, well, why don't you just be happy for you and go away.

But.

But I can't do that.

And so there seems to arise with that in us.

And I think it's because it's our.

Our divine nature.

We're built to love and serve each other.

And your coherence and connection of all those points of light is a beautiful example.

Love is an attractive force.

Fear, hate, all that other stuff is a repelling, divisive, negative force.

We can see that.

So being, loving yourself, finding your spark, reflecting that beautifully to others.

What a beautiful description.

So thank you for that.

That's my pleasure.

I feel very lucky.

I've had beautiful meditations.

I've done plant medicines and such in my life.

But the most Profound visions I've ever had.

A bit sober and meditation.

I agree with you.

I had a guy I was talking to the other day that said, you know, he had never done this, and he was feeling really moved to go do a plant ceremony.

Yeah, I don't care.

But I had another client who'd done it like, 20 times, and every time he went to connect to the universe and everything, he came back with all this stuff.

And.

And then I said, okay, well, are we gonna, like, is this gonna cause some change in action?

And it seemed like it turned into a crutch or a thing to go do from outside.

And the truth is in you.

The truth isn't out there.

Spark is in you.

The divinity is in you.

The capability is in you.

The love is in you.

It's not out there somewhere.

Yeah, it's.

For what it's worth.

What David Guillaume, the teacher I mentioned earlier, who said the thing about your neighbors and attacking you, I love the way he put it in the Kabbalah class I was studying.

I've studied Kabbalah for about 13, 14 years now.

And David said, if you were to tell me you're never going to study Kabbalah or go deep into spirituality in your life, I would say, go do plant medicine.

But he's like, not having done it himself.

Right.

Because sometimes it can be a catalyst, and we all might need that little extra nudge to see that inner spark.

So you can get there through deep spiritual work, bala Buddhism, other studies, whatever lights your, you know, spark, so to speak.

Or you can also do something like plant medicine to kind of jumpstart it for you, though you can get to the same destination.

It's.

As I mentioned earlier, there's all these breadcrumbs that lead us to our destiny.

There are many paths.

Some meander and have brambles, and some are beautiful rolling hills of green and fountains and water and fairy dust.

Well, I love that, and I agree with you 100%.

And, you know, I have always felt that the.

The.

The tools are in you, and if you need other tools, that's fine, but the tools.

And I just.

The tools are in you.

The capabilities in you.

You matter.

You have this.

Even if it's got layers of white noise on the TV over the top of it, it's time to turn that down and start where Jen taught us, which is at the.

At the place of stillness to start with.

So what else haven't I asked you that you would love to share?

Comes up for you, that would be like, ooh, that's cool.

Let's do that.

What I just heard, I feel deeply people's energy and how the audience is responding to this.

What I just heard, Kellen, is, yeah, but I feel safe, sad.

Kellen.

Jen, I get it.

You're talking about things that are so far outside my capacity.

And I just want.

I want those of you who are feeling that way to know I've been there.

I have been so inconsolable and so crushingly lonely and sad that I couldn't get out of bed, that I drank and I drugged and I was bulimic for a decade.

I don't want you to think that you're broken or wrong.

Wherever you're at, if you're feeling crushingly sad right now, allow yourself to feel that way sometimes even doing the littlest thing.

You know, we were talking earlier about being of service.

I remember when I first started studying Kabbalah, they talk about how to get yourself out of depression.

And I've been depressed in my life more times than I'd like to count, really suicidally depressed.

And the thing I know now is twofold.

That changes things for me.

One, that when we're sad, if we can do one act of kindness for another person, smiling, opening a door, getting outside of that self and, you know, going deeper and deeper into the loneliness, get outside of yourself.

See if you can do one kind thing, go volunteer, be of service to somebody else.

And the other thing when it comes to depression is that sometimes we don't even know how to ask for help.

How to run up the white flag and just say, please help me is share.

You know, we all have one person.

It could be the person at the grocery store, we all have to eat right, or the Uber eats person who drops off your food.

Share.

Just share and say that you need help, because there's no shame in needing help.

And one of the things that now helps me kabbalistically is I understand that we all go through different tests and challenges that are designed for our soul.

And God forbid, you know, if we do choose to take our own life, which some people do, we get to come back and do it all over again, but harder.

So that's one of the big things that, you know, stops me now is I go, okay, I'm going to give myself permission to feel sad.

And I choose how long I'm going to be sad for.

So before sadness would overwhelm me and depression would overwhelm me for days, weeks, months, years.

And now when I get depressed or if I feel sad, I Still feel sad.

I still feel lonely.

I'm still human.

There is no perfection in any of us.

None of us can be perfect.

We still have human emotions and feelings, though.

When I feel that way, I talk to it.

I say, okay, sadness, what are you trying to teach me?

What does that feel like?

I was just doing an interview with another interesting guy.

He'd be a great guest for your show as well, Dr. Andy Hahn, who has a book called the One Hour Miracle, and he was sharing with me how he was treating depression, that he would have his patients go into that feeling.

One guy described it like oatmeal.

You know, like being in sticky oatmeal and, you know, figuring out what is that feeling?

Trying to teach you, where does it come from?

And the moment we can just be with the most difficult aspects of ourselves, of somebody else, of those feelings we don't want to feel, then when we can be with that without resistance, that's where freedom comes.

That's where suffering ends and limitless possibility begins.

I love that.

I had a friend that described something like that.

This way, if you fully experience the end, the outcome of any feeling that is fully experienced is joy.

And what he meant by that is, even these sad ones, if you give yourself permission, I'm sad.

I'm overwhelmingly sad.

And I feel that.

And ask the questions that you've just said, what is this?

What is about?

What can I learn here?

What's the gift here?

That's the one I always use.

What's the gift here?

And I mean it when I ask it.

It's not sarcastic, because that requires a degree of surrender, which is I believe that there is possibility and there is a path here.

And so rather than fight it or be mad at it, I'm just going to ask, what's the gift here?

And sincerely look for it.

And to go do something nice.

It's so easy on social.

One of the things I do in the morning is I go through in my creations.

I'll go through whatever, Facebook messenger, WhatsApp or whatever, and I'll go through those, and inspiration will strike.

And I will send people messages of love and uplift and maybe repair or acquaintance or something.

And something about doing that does what you're talking about, because you're doing a thing, you're reflecting a spark or you're acknowledging a spark in someone.

Yeah, Beautiful, Kellen.

And one other thing on the flip side that I'm about to share with the audience is one of my new favorite things.

There was something created by Glenn and Natalie ledwell called Mind Movies that was sold to Joe Dispenza I don't know how many years ago.

And they had a software where you would stream together different images and then it would be a turn into Mind Movie.

I think it still exists, I'm not sure.

So you could go to that website.

And the way that I started playing with it a couple months ago is in March, I was like, wait a Second, we have ChatGPT and AI.

I wonder if I could custom create images of my dream life and weave those into a series of images using canva or Chat or something and call it like my version of a mind movie.

Right.

Where you would call it like a vision board, a moving vision board, whatever you would want to call it.

And I, Kellen, it has been remarkable.

I've done it for myself, myself, for my coaching clients.

The Results, the first 10 slides I created back on, like, March 15th, by, I think it was end of April, five of the slides had happened of things I wanted to create in the world.

And so now I'm teaching everybody else how to do it.

I love it.

I remember actually when my movies first came out, it was Natalie and then some fellow that she was working with for a while.

Yeah, Glenn, way back, I think it was 2012 or 13, 12 or 13 years ago.

And I remember them coming out and I actually bought one, bought a subscription to whatever it was then.

Of course, the software has evolved at least 5,000 times since then.

I mean, after all, 13 years is forever.

Well, that's fabulous.

And so I agree with that.

The mind movies are fun.

They're powerful, and they're fun to make, too.

Yeah, it's perfect vision.

You know, we used to do these vision boards.

And I can't tell you how many times in my life, Kellen, I've created a vision board.

And it was back in the day where you, like, rip out pieces of magazine and then stick it on, like a cork board or whatever.

And now we can do that with AI.

And so why not everybody, like, we spend so much time on social.

Take your favorite images on social.

But, and I will caution you, here's a funny story about this.

So one of the images of the first 10 slides I created for my first movie was a private jet.

I was like, ah, you know, I've flown private a few times.

I'd love to fly private more.

But here was the funny thing because careful what you wish for.

So that exact private jet that was in my movie on the tarmac at sunset, I got on the jet, but it didn't take off because it was at a private event where they were featuring private jets.

So you have to be sure if you want to be on private jet, it has to be in the air, you know?

So think carefully about what it is you're creating and be nuanced about the literalness of it.

I love that.

So let's.

Let's make sure everybody knows where to find you.

So if they've heard you and you've given such moving and true and powerful stories and advice and help and encouragement, where can people get more of Jennifer Cahill?

Thank you, Kellen.

I appreciate it.

So, one thing I would recommend again, you can go to jenniferkhill.com is a nice, easy way that you can connect with me there.

I also write a weekly LinkedIn newsletter called Insights Inspired Living Tools.

If you Google Inspired Living Tools, every week a new newsletter comes out with some of my favorite tips and tools.

And you can find an episode I did with Kellen on my Super Connections podcast.

So for years, I did a podcast called Regarding Consciousness.

You can still find those.

I did it with Deepak Chopra and Don Hoffman and Bruce Lipton and Greg Braden and all sorts of lovely folks who are friends.

And then I pivoted that one to one that we just had killing on called Super Connection.

So you can now find that one.

If anybody's interested, it.

Thank you.

Is there any final thing you'd like to live leave with us from your brightness and your joy?

And I want to really acknowledge you for sharing your soul, your tears, your heart, your love, the truth of your becoming and your being with us today.

Thank you, Kellen.

I will leave everybody with a quote that I began a class with yesterday.

The world is not.

We don't see the world as it is.

We see the world as we are.

So ask yourself, what filter are you seeing yourself, your life, and the world through today?

If you don't like that filter, choose a different one.

You know, it's so profound to understand that we can choose a different one because we start with our lenses that we have, and we have this story that that's the only ones that exist, right?

I mean, we do see the world the way we are.

We can't do anything else.

It's the only ones we've got until we realize you can take them off.

You know, that's the first realization.

Of course.

You see the world the way you are.

What else can you do?

And the revelation is, I don't have to wear those.

And that's the beauty.

I love it.

I love it.

Jennifer, thank you for being on the show today.

Thank you, Kellen.

And thank you to your listeners and audience.

I'm intending each and every one of you, maybe there was some little nugget, whatever it is may grow in you and may your spark grow too.

And may you be able to see the spark in yourself and in those around you.

I want to encourage you to go back and listen to this again, maybe some parts a couple of times or three times or five times.

Write down the names, the websites that she gave us because there's good in there.

There's gold in there for you.

And you'll know as you listen what's for you.

Because if you do that and you follow your intuition, you'll be able to create your ultimate life.

Right now, your opportunity for mass and grow growth is right in front of you.

Every episode gives you practical tips and practices that will change everything.

If you want to know more, go to kellenflukermedia.com if you want more free tools, go here YourUltimateLife CA subscribe, share.

And your feet are on the ground.