Sept. 16, 2025

The Empathy Warrior: How a 4-Time World Champion Turns Trauma Into Triumph

The Empathy Warrior: How a 4-Time World Champion Turns Trauma Into Triumph

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Meet Stuart Wade—a champion fighter who transformed his own trauma into a mission to heal others. In this powerful conversation, Stuart reveals how he went from being a "hurt person who hurt people" to becoming a mind coach who helps others break through their deepest psychological barriers.

You'll discover:

• Why "hurt people hurt people"—and how to break that cycle

• The neurological techniques that reprogram trauma responses

• How breathing can instantly calm your nervous system

• Why Stuart believes "everyone is good deep down" (and the science behind it)

• The mindset shift that turns obstacles into opportunities

• How to access your "success gear" without waiting for crisis

Stuart combines his championship discipline with clinical training in hypnotherapy, EMDR, and NLP to create breakthrough transformations. His unique approach bridges the gap between mental toughness and emotional intelligence.

This isn't just another success story—it's a blueprint for turning your deepest wounds into your greatest strengths.

👉 CONNECT WITH STUART WADE: Discover Stuart's "Black Belt Mindset" approach and transformational mind coaching at TheMindCoach.co.uk

👉 JOIN THE DREAM BUILD WRITE IT CHALLENGE: Your story is gold—learn how to create and write the story that will transform your life. Join the next Dream Build Write It Challenge at www.dreambuildwriteit.com

Chapters

00:00 - Untitled

00:00 - The Journey of Martial Arts

01:11 - The Power of Empathy: A Journey of Healing and Service

14:19 - Resilience and Overcoming Challenges

20:44 - Meeting Them Where They Are

27:14 - Beginning the Journey of Breathwork

35:55 - The Journey of Overcoming Limiting Beliefs

Transcript
Speaker A

Starting martial arts.

Speaker A

That's.

Speaker A

That's where it started for me when I was six years old.

Speaker B

Welcome to the show.

Speaker B

Tired of the hype about living the dream.

Speaker B

It's time for truth.

Speaker B

This is the place for tools, power, and real talk, so you can create the life you dream and deserve your ultimate life.

Speaker B

Subscribe, share, create.

Speaker B

You have infinite power.

Speaker B

Hi, there.

Speaker B

Welcome to this episode of youf Ultimate Life, the podcast dedicated to helping you create a life of purpose, prosperity, and joy that you absolutely love to wake up to every day.

Speaker B

I've got a special guest today, Stuart Wade.

Speaker B

Stuart, welcome to the show.

Speaker A

Thank you for having me, Kellan.

Speaker A

I appreciate it.

Speaker B

Oh, you're delightfully welcome.

Speaker B

I'm glad to have you here and excited to dive into the stuff you're doing.

Speaker B

I don't do introductions because that is unfolding all through the show, and other than that, it's just a bunch of jabber.

Speaker B

So let's just dive in.

Speaker B

I asked you before we started, what is the most interesting, powerful gift you have to offer the world?

Speaker B

And you said, empathy.

Speaker B

What a cool answer.

Speaker B

Tell me why.

Speaker A

Yeah, so my gut instinct instantly told me empathy when you asked me that question.

Speaker A

And I believe it is my story, it is my origin story that took me from starting martial arts.

Speaker A

That's.

Speaker A

That's where it started for me, when I was six years old, and through a lot of triumph, but also a lot of heartache, a lot of sadness, a lot of disappointment, a lot of difficulties, arguably some traumas.

Speaker A

Going through those things, overcoming them, and then eventually studying and learning from great mentors who helped me to understand what I'd been through, overcome it neurologically, subconsciously, and then empowering me to help others who've been through the same sort of thing.

Speaker A

And I have always resonated with that phrase, hurt people, hurt people.

Speaker A

And I want to change that because I've been one of those hurt people.

Speaker A

But I don't want to hurt people.

Speaker A

I want to help people.

Speaker A

I want to empower people.

Speaker A

But I deeply feel for people when they've been through struggles and difficulties, and I feel like it's my mission to help people around the world with that.

Speaker A

And here we are today.

Speaker B

So that's a special gift because so many people have.

Speaker B

Everybody has, you know, their own list of traumas and struggles.

Speaker B

Right.

Speaker B

Everybody feels like nobody knows the trouble I've seen, but Jesus, you know, everybody thinks their life is the worst of whatever, and it's probably true for them.

Speaker B

And you.

Speaker B

You decided that after you overcame those things and got the help, you Needed, you decided you were going to set about helping others.

Speaker B

I mean, you could have just said, I'm cool, I got it.

Speaker B

But you said, no, no, I feel called to help in that way.

Speaker B

Tell me about that.

Speaker A

Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker A

So I've always been quite a caring person, naturally, and I definitely attribute a lot of that to my upbringing from my parents, my family.

Speaker A

We have been a bit of a typical British family in some ways, the stiff upper lip and that kind of thing.

Speaker A

But there was always a lot of care and a lot of love there.

Speaker A

And it was visceral.

Speaker A

You felt it.

Speaker A

And so I think having that instilled in me from a young age really laid the foundations for this.

Speaker A

And so when I've been through difficulties that I've been through, seeing others going through that around the same time, even afterwards, I've always felt for them.

Speaker A

I've always wanted to help where I can.

Speaker A

And so, as by chance would happen, meeting certain mentors and getting the help that I needed with at the time, it was clinical hypnotherapy that I received a number of years ago.

Speaker A

Now, getting that help actually provided the vehicle for me with which I could help people.

Speaker A

Because it's one thing being a supporting person, just being there as a shoulder to cry on, or being just there to listen and be a sounding board, but I feel called to do more.

Speaker A

And learning clinical hypnotherapy and the various other modalities that I've been trained in over the years through different mentors, that gives me the vehicle to really help people at a deep level and help them to overcome whatever they are going through.

Speaker A

And I love that.

Speaker A

I really love that.

Speaker A

It's a real joy for me.

Speaker B

You know, that's interesting because one of the ways I describe that feeling is that we literally, physiologically, we're built to love and serve, and people ascribe it to survival and a bunch of other things.

Speaker B

But when we're in the mode of helping and in community and, you know, we have more oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine, we have these good things, things that feel in us.

Speaker B

And you know what else I think?

Speaker B

I mean, we all know that there's two parts to us.

Speaker B

There's a physical part and there's an energetic or spiritual part.

Speaker B

And I think there's some kind of parallel neurotransmitters in the spirit.

Speaker B

You know, we don't know their names, but because it just feels juicy, it feels fun to see someone succeed and to love and serve.

Speaker B

And, you know, some people have Lived with difficulties and they beat that feeling out of themselves or allowed circumstance.

Speaker B

But the truth of our natures is we are literally built to love and serve.

Speaker B

So I love that you said with emphasis, I'm called to do that.

Speaker B

Tell me about that calling.

Speaker B

Like you're going to have empathy for people's struggle.

Speaker B

Are you trying to help ten people?

Speaker B

A thousand?

Speaker B

A million?

Speaker B

Like, what is your.

Speaker B

If you picture the world after Stuart has spread the blanket of empathy, what does it look like?

Speaker A

Totally different.

Speaker B

Tell me, tell me something.

Speaker A

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker A

So I genuinely believe that when we can get over the competition aspect and the kind of tribal programming that we often have as human beings and we can actually see that collaboration and teamwork will help us to go further together as a species and solve some of the difficulties that we're experiencing in the world right now and some of the things that may be on the horizon.

Speaker A

I truly think that every single life on the planet could be changed with that.

Speaker A

And it's not necessarily that I'm going to be working with every single person individually to do that, but it's helping the people that can make the change, Working with those people who have the power to change the course of history and filter it from the top down.

Speaker A

Because I truly believe that most people are good, everybody is good deep down and we just got to tap into that and remind each other what it's all about.

Speaker B

Yeah, wonderful.

Speaker B

So there's some really interesting and I would argue really powerful things that you've said there.

Speaker B

I believe deep down everybody is good.

Speaker B

There would be people that would challenge that.

Speaker B

There would be people that say, no, we're basically animals.

Speaker B

Greedy.

Speaker B

I got mine.

Speaker B

Screw you and your dog.

Speaker B

That, that, you know, that, that people would argue that and because their life experience has taught them that.

Speaker B

And you are saying, yeah, I acknowledge all that.

Speaker B

But I still believe that if we can tap into the right, we use some woo woo words here, tap into the right frequency or vibration or whatever it is and, you know, come to our true selves and all that crap that we say, and it's not crap, but it sounds like it sometimes that, that, that we can actually and really make some fundamental changes.

Speaker B

Do you believe that?

Speaker A

I really do.

Speaker A

Yeah, I really do.

Speaker B

How does that manifest?

Speaker B

So I see before me a wonderful, empathetic, powerful man who's gone through his own changes and has made it his mission to help.

Speaker B

How do you think we can.

Speaker B

How do you go about activating that belief that people are basically good and you're looking for influencers and people with Positions to do two things.

Speaker B

One, to accept and resonate with the truth you just proclaimed, because they have to believe it, too, and then to do something with that.

Speaker B

How do you do that?

Speaker A

It's a really good question, Kellen.

Speaker A

And I think that spreading positive messages like you do on this show with the guests that you have genuinely is what, one of the best ways, because it, it can reach everybody.

Speaker A

You know, as long as you have access to the Internet and you can, you can download a podcast, you have access to a wealth of information and a wealth of brilliant people who can shift perspectives.

Speaker A

And so messaging like that on platforms like this, and I'm not trying to blow smoke, I'm genuinely, I think, I think that is, is the way to reach millions and millions of people.

Speaker A

And I know that's your mission as well, so I think it's brilliant.

Speaker B

Well, I do.

Speaker B

I mean, you know, and my listeners know my mission this year.

Speaker B

Not even a mission commitment.

Speaker B

And my year ends in two months, 14th of October.

Speaker B

And I don't think you've.

Speaker B

I've ever told you the story about why that is, but it doesn't matter.

Speaker B

New Year's is October 14, but to reach 300 million people this year, and you are part of that.

Speaker B

Not just you, but everybody that you'll share this with, because it isn't just my message.

Speaker B

It's your message of empathy, positivity, possibility.

Speaker B

The message that deep down everybody's good.

Speaker B

The message that no matter what you've been through, there's a way through it.

Speaker B

And you have developed mastery at certain tools, hypnotherapy, and you didn't tell me the others, but it doesn't matter.

Speaker B

A slate of modalities that you apply in circumstances to give people the vision and the opportunity to see what could be.

Speaker B

And together we're going to do that.

Speaker B

We are going to change the world.

Speaker B

So I can't help but notice the great slate of trophies on the shelf behind your head.

Speaker B

And I don't think it's an accident that you are positioned there as we do this interview.

Speaker B

So tell me about those things.

Speaker B

What does that represent in your life?

Speaker A

So those are a great reminder for me of what one can do when one puts your mind to it.

Speaker A

And they are, they are from my martial arts career.

Speaker A

I am grateful to have had a lot of success.

Speaker A

When I first started training at six years old, I. I loved the training.

Speaker A

I really resonated with learning the techniques, and I enjoyed going through the belt system and all of that kind of stuff.

Speaker A

But at the Time.

Speaker A

I hated the competition aspect of it.

Speaker A

And as a result, I didn't have a lot of success very early on.

Speaker A

But it was only when I overcame some difficulties early on.

Speaker A

I failed my black belt grading at the first time of asking, which was just before my ninth birthday.

Speaker A

And this is a slight digression, but I was told by my instructors that I would walk it.

Speaker A

And so of course I took that to heart.

Speaker A

I thought, well, it's a, it's a shoo in.

Speaker A

I'm going to get this.

Speaker A

At almost nine years old.

Speaker A

And it transpired that the grading panel that day were particularly harsh.

Speaker A

And it was comprised of 10 Korean masters and grandmasters.

Speaker A

They'd flown in to the UK for the grading from Korea.

Speaker A

And there was around 300 or so students testing from all over the country.

Speaker A

And around 30 to 40 students were going from my hometown.

Speaker A

Of those 30 to 40 students, three passed.

Speaker B

Wow.

Speaker A

All the rest failed.

Speaker A

And I was, I was one of the ones that failed.

Speaker A

And the way that they did that I believe again was particularly harsh because at the close of the grading, when they were announcing the results, everybody was sat cross legged on the hard flooring, in straight rows, straight backs, good posture, silence.

Speaker A

And the spokesperson for the panel would read your name if you passed, and they would skip you if you failed.

Speaker A

And so they went along the rows student by student.

Speaker A

And so the student to my right, his name was read.

Speaker A

And so I knew that mine was going to be next.

Speaker A

And it wasn't.

Speaker A

It was the person to.

Speaker A

I left and so they skipped me.

Speaker A

And in that moment I was heartbroken, absolutely heartbroken, because I traveled down almost to London on my own, without my parents, without my family, just with the other students.

Speaker A

And so that was the moment for me that really sparked some resilience because once I'd gotten over that initial heartache, I never wanted to feel that again.

Speaker A

And I tested again a few weeks later.

Speaker A

Sorry, a few months later, about three months later.

Speaker A

And I passed at that point.

Speaker A

And I specifically remember seeing a student who I was familiar with that failed that day.

Speaker A

And I even remember to this day consoling him at that time, because I'd been there a few months prior.

Speaker A

And I knew that if I could just give some encouragement in that moment, it would help him on his next upgrading and hopefully beyond.

Speaker A

And so getting back to the competition side, once that resilience and motivation to succeed was sparked within me, I started having more success competitively.

Speaker A

And from the age of 13, pretty much every year until I stepped away from Competition in my mid-20s, I represented Great Britain or England in major internationals every single year.

Speaker A

And I'm very blessed to have won four World Championships, three European Championships, and 20 British Championships throughout my time competing.

Speaker A

And so this shelf behind me is a reminder to what I can do when I put my mind to it, and that resilience to overcome challenges.

Speaker A

Things aren't always going to go the way that we want them to, but if we want it badly enough, the how will figure itself out.

Speaker A

We'll find a way.

Speaker B

So I love that last sentence.

Speaker B

The how will figure itself out.

Speaker B

I was in a mastermind many years ago for several years with someone who's retired now, but some.

Speaker B

Many call him the godfather of coaching.

Speaker B

Steve Chandler, who's written like 40 books and helped with the University of Santa Monica Masters in Spiritual Psychology program and all this stuff.

Speaker B

But anyway, his way of saying that was when that want to gets big enough, the how to just shows up.

Speaker A

You know, I like that.

Speaker B

And that's what you just said, and I love it.

Speaker B

And Steve is a great big, tall guy.

Speaker B

He's a big, big.

Speaker B

Well, I don't know, six, four or five, whatever.

Speaker B

And he's big, and he's so deadpan.

Speaker B

He is so funny.

Speaker B

Accidentally funny, right?

Speaker B

But anyway, so I love that the how to.

Speaker B

Now, that's a wonderful and inspiring story.

Speaker B

And as you work with people with your empathy and your ability to understand, like you've consoled that other fellow.

Speaker A

How.

Speaker B

Difficult is it to get people to see, to internalize and own the truth that whatever their struggle is, that it is also true that when the want to gets big enough, the house shows up or that you can create whatever you want to, if you want to go work at it, or if you won't give up, or if you get the right help or mentors and you know, all the stuff that we say as coaches, because it's so easy for people to say, yeah, but.

Speaker B

Yeah, but it doesn't count.

Speaker B

Yeah, but that's different.

Speaker B

Yeah, but I'm special.

Speaker B

Yeah, but you don't understand.

Speaker B

Yeah, but Yebbit.

Speaker B

Yeah, but it reminds me of Bugs Bunny.

Speaker B

Webbit, Webbit, Webbit.

Speaker B

Right, so.

Speaker B

And anybody that's old enough to remember Elmer Fudd, you know that.

Speaker B

But so what?

Speaker B

How hard is it to get people to slow down enough and to bodily internalize that truth?

Speaker A

It's a good question.

Speaker A

And oftentimes it's individual.

Speaker A

You know, one person will have a different switch than another.

Speaker A

But I found that letting them air out whatever their story is and then meeting them where they are and metaphorically taking them by the hand to just challenge some of those limiting beliefs in an empathetic way with concern, with care, just get them to challenge some of those things to see if that narrative is actually true.

Speaker A

Then if there's willing there, then we can start to unravel these things and, and figure out what the deep burning reason why is that they want a different outcome.

Speaker A

Because if they've come to me in the first place, there's an inkling at the very least that they want something different.

Speaker B

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker B

So there is.

Speaker B

And I love that you said meet them where they are and that's another coachee type buzz phrase that we use.

Speaker B

What does that mean?

Speaker A

So if a client comes to me and tells me why everything in their life is crap and nothing's working out, it won't work for them for XYZ reason, I would say, yeah, I can see that.

Speaker A

I can really feel that for you.

Speaker A

And it's tough.

Speaker A

It's a real tough situation.

Speaker A

And if they are using colorful language, I might meet them there with that as well and throw a few more colorful terms in there as well.

Speaker A

Because at least then I'm acknowledging their pain, I'm acknowledging what they're going through and that makes them feel seen and heard.

Speaker A

And so then automatically that builds that rapport with, with what I'm saying and they are going to hold my thoughts, my words, in a little bit higher esteem.

Speaker A

That that brick wall that they've built up is just going to start to come down.

Speaker A

They're going to take some bricks off there and start to just let some of my words in at that point.

Speaker A

But it does start with acknowledging that.

Speaker A

Because if I was to go in, say no, don't be silly, it's not all bad.

Speaker A

No, it's not going to jive with them.

Speaker A

They're just going to be completely ignorant to that because it's so different to the narrative that they've told themselves.

Speaker A

So that's what it means to me.

Speaker A

Meet them where they are.

Speaker A

Acknowledge that they're seen, they're heard.

Speaker A

Okay, now let's start to move things along.

Speaker A

Let's start to change that a little bit.

Speaker B

You said two really important points.

Speaker B

One is the willingness, you know what medical professionals say, and show all the time that the biggest determining factor for someone healing even from serious and life threatening illnesses is their desire to live.

Speaker B

I want it.

Speaker B

I want it.

Speaker B

And fanning the flame of want to is such an important part of what you do and your ability to reach people.

Speaker B

And the second Thing besides that want to is meeting them where they are.

Speaker B

I think of that in terms of listening, how we listen to them.

Speaker B

And listening is such an underdeveloped skill because we spend our time, it seems to me, listening with the idea of how we're even if we're trying to help.

Speaker B

Excuse me.

Speaker B

Okay, I hear you and here's what I'm going to say.

Speaker B

And oh, I've got all this cool stuff lined up and I'm just going to blow you away with all this amazing stuff.

Speaker B

And instead what I found is what you've said.

Speaker B

If I listen with nothing in mind except just to be with you and hear you, and then it might take some space after you're done talking, before I even have anything to say, because half my mind hasn't been busy concocting that.

Speaker B

The energy of that kind of listening is what creates that connection.

Speaker B

Because somebody can feel right away when you're even 2/3 there.

Speaker B

And so you've captured something that I want to restate because I agree with it so much that our willingness and that has to do with vulnerability because we sometimes have the idea we're supposed to, quote, know some kind of an answer, whatever.

Speaker B

If we dump that whole idea, we're just there to hear you and then we think with you together.

Speaker B

Well, I don't know.

Speaker B

But what about this from the same place that we were with them in listening.

Speaker B

That's kind of a convoluted thought.

Speaker B

But did you.

Speaker B

Does how does that land with you in terms of how you work and what you believe?

Speaker A

Yeah, that makes total sense to me.

Speaker A

And it really resonates because that is what I strive to do with my clients.

Speaker A

Yeah.

Speaker B

So I'm going to take strive away from you.

Speaker B

That is what you do.

Speaker B

It is who you are.

Speaker B

And I want you to talk for a minute about how you create yourself so that you are that.

Speaker B

So that that becomes how you show up.

Speaker B

Because in the world of so much pressure and noise and news and competition and all the stuff you talked about earlier, it takes an intentional, focused effort to choose to be that.

Speaker B

So how do you do that amidst all the noisiness of life?

Speaker A

So I'll bring this back to martial arts a little bit because predominantly when I was either in a grading or in a competition side of the martial arts, I would be fully focused, I would be fully zoned in and present in the moment that there was no thoughts going on about something that happened back then or something that may happen.

Speaker A

I'm not worried about what other people are thinking.

Speaker A

I'M just fully present in the moment, in my mind and body, doing what I need to do in the moment.

Speaker A

And when I'm working with someone, it's exactly the same.

Speaker A

I'm fully present in the moment.

Speaker A

I'm not concerned about anything outside of what's going on between the two of us at that time.

Speaker A

I like to ground myself, first of all, and take some deep breaths, just to give myself some space and some separation from the noise and all of the demands that go on outside of delivering a session.

Speaker A

And once I've given myself that space, I allow myself to just become fully present, and then I can direct that present energy towards my client.

Speaker A

And that's how, again, I can meet them where they are without any preconceived ideas, without any agendas going in, without some protocol that I want them to try.

Speaker A

I'm just there.

Speaker A

And that enables me to listen and to empathize deeply with them.

Speaker A

And then we figure it out from there.

Speaker B

And then we figure it out from there.

Speaker B

I love that.

Speaker B

How important.

Speaker B

Like, people are going to listen to this and they're going to think whatever they think.

Speaker B

But I want you to give some instruction, as it were, right now, about how people can do some of that separation, because my experience is that most people don't know how to do that.

Speaker B

When I talk to people about being still or stillness or being present or meditation or however we want to describe that thing, they're like, yeah, my mind's too busy.

Speaker B

I don't have time.

Speaker B

5 minutes, 20 minutes.

Speaker B

Are you out of your mind?

Speaker B

You know, they sort of are responding from the place of overwhelm and busyness.

Speaker B

And you've now told me that that's what you do.

Speaker B

So you have developed a practice of creating space to allow you to be.

Speaker B

To give that unbelievable gift of presence and listening.

Speaker B

I want you to teach us here for a minute, some things about how to do that.

Speaker B

So Joe or Jane or Barbara or Bill or whoever's listening right now, and they may be wondering about that.

Speaker B

So even for forget being coaches or anything, just managing life, talk to me about how to help someone do that right now.

Speaker A

One of, if not the simplest technique that I ever learned to calm my mind, calm my body, and become more centered, grounded, and present is a breathing technique called the physiological sigh.

Speaker A

And I'm sure that some of your listeners may have heard of that.

Speaker A

It's.

Speaker A

It's a neuroscience practice that I've heard some prominent neuroscientists talk about.

Speaker A

And since I adopted that a few years ago when I first learned about it.

Speaker A

It's been an absolute game changer for me personally and the clients that I teach it to.

Speaker A

And so what I recommend that they do is just sit comfortably.

Speaker A

You could do it standing, but it's helpful to sit and just get comfortable.

Speaker A

First of all, if you want to close your eyes, you can.

Speaker A

You don't have to.

Speaker A

It doesn't matter really.

Speaker A

And the process is a double inhale through the nose and then a slow exhale through the mouth.

Speaker A

Now, when I'll get a little bit sciency here, but when we do a full intake of breath, not every alveoli in our lungs inflates, because it doesn't need to.

Speaker A

Our bodies don't.

Speaker A

Or rather our bodies keep in reserve some space at times.

Speaker A

We don't use every single muscle fiber when we're doing a bicep curl at the gym unless we're trying to max out.

Speaker A

And even then we still have some in reserve.

Speaker A

It's the same thing.

Speaker A

And so our body will inflate as many alveoli as it needs to when we inhale.

Speaker A

But then when we force another inhale, we get some extra oxygen in there, we force extra alveoli to inflate.

Speaker A

Now what that does is gives more oxygen to attach to our red blood cells, which will then filter out into our body and our minds, our brains rather.

Speaker A

But then when we slowly exhale through the mouth, that is telling our parasympathetic nervous system, which is also known as the rest and digest nervous system, that we're safe, we can relax, it's calm.

Speaker A

We don't need to be anywhere.

Speaker A

We're not getting chased by a saber toothed tiger right now.

Speaker A

We can just relax.

Speaker A

And it's an automatic subconscious signal.

Speaker A

A slow exhale of breath like that tells that part of our nervous system that we're relaxed.

Speaker A

Now, I recommend that people do this for maybe five breaths.

Speaker A

Do it in a cyclical fashion.

Speaker A

If you do it just once, you will feel noticeably calmer.

Speaker A

Do it five times, it'll take you 90 seconds maybe, depending on how big your lung capacity is.

Speaker A

And you will feel instantly calmer if you instantly more grounded, more centered and more present.

Speaker A

And so it looks like this.

Speaker A

So I would go, that's one.

Speaker A

So I would do that five times.

Speaker A

And I would guarantee that after doing that, you feel calmer, there's less intrusive thoughts, you feel more relaxed, more present.

Speaker A

And I haven't come across anybody that I've shown that to that it doesn't work with.

Speaker A

So that would be Number one.

Speaker B

Well, that's fabulous.

Speaker B

And so I absolutely recommend that you do that because I spoke with Stuart several weeks ago and I think he showed me that and I did it and tried it.

Speaker B

And breathwork in general, the category of breathwork, you know, Wim Hof and Joe Dorkstick and whoever, all have different breathing techniques.

Speaker B

And guess what?

Speaker B

They all work and they all do good stuff.

Speaker B

And so the one Stuart has just gifted, you do that.

Speaker B

Don't say, oh, that's cool.

Speaker B

I'd try that sometime because that won't help you because you're going to forget.

Speaker B

And so do that now, a deep inhale.

Speaker B

And then you saw him do that forced pull, second breath in.

Speaker B

And I love the scientific description about blowing up a few more blobs of someone who had a fatal lung infection who lost staggering lung capacity a few years ago.

Speaker B

I have done a lot of work to do that.

Speaker B

And I can tell you how important what you've said and your emphasis on breathing.

Speaker B

Breath is life.

Speaker B

Breath is life.

Speaker B

And so I love that.

Speaker B

Thank you for sharing that with us.

Speaker A

You're welcome.

Speaker B

All right, so I'm going to go in a different direction now.

Speaker B

Tell me about your coaching work.

Speaker B

Like, who do you work with?

Speaker B

What kinds of people come to you?

Speaker B

Where are they?

Speaker B

What kind of things do you address?

Speaker B

And you mentioned hypnosis.

Speaker B

Maybe you'll throw in a couple of other modalities that you use if it's appropriate.

Speaker B

But tell me about the work, and here's the context.

Speaker B

The way I usually ask this question is tell me how Stuart adds good to the world.

Speaker B

And I'm going to bound that just by saying there may be a million ways, but right now, in the context of the offering that you have to the world because of your training, because of your martial arts work, because of the discipline that you have applied across the board.

Speaker B

How do you do that?

Speaker B

What do you do?

Speaker A

So I typically work with business owners and athletes.

Speaker A

Generally speaking, those are the people that I work with.

Speaker A

That said, I do have the odd client now and again that doesn't fit into those demographics.

Speaker A

But they're struggling and they resonate with me, my messaging, and they feel that I'm the right person to help them.

Speaker A

And so if that is reciprocated, then I take on those people as well.

Speaker A

But generally speaking, it's the business owner who's stressed.

Speaker A

They're working every hour that God sends and they're at a ceiling.

Speaker A

They just can't seem to figure out a way to continue on the path that they're on.

Speaker A

Because they want to grow the business, they want to excel.

Speaker A

They've probably got stuff psychologically, emotionally, maybe even physically holding them back as well.

Speaker A

And so they're the spinning a bunch of plates while actually dealing with stuff that maybe no one else knows about as well.

Speaker A

So I help them to overcome whatever those things are, whether it is a traumatic experience or something that happened at a certain point in their lives that created some kind of limiting belief that they're not good enough.

Speaker A

They'll never achieve the heights that someone else has.

Speaker A

It's not for them.

Speaker A

Whatever the internal narrative may be.

Speaker A

And that subconscious wiring is holding them back from achieving more.

Speaker A

It's holding them back from overcoming whatever it is that's been keeping them stuck.

Speaker A

And so I meet them where they are.

Speaker A

If they have a trauma, then I do a particular technique with that, which is a development of emdr, which I'm sure some of your listeners will have heard of and I'm sure you know all about Kellen.

Speaker A

So I'm trained in emdr, but the technique that I use is a combination of EMDR with hypnotic suggestion.

Speaker A

Because with emdr, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing the act of eye fixation on a focal point.

Speaker A

As we move that focal point, that actually slows our brain waves down into the area in which hypnotic trance can become apparent.

Speaker A

And so by utilizing the eye movements, not only are we processing neurologically the trauma and moving it from one side of the amygdala through the corpus callosum to the other side.

Speaker A

And the logical and the creative hemispheres of the brain are processing that actively, but we're also then tapping in subconsciously by giving certain suggestions, certain ways of thinking, certain ways of feeling, and subsequently behaving.

Speaker A

So I would do that with someone who has some trauma that is hampering them, is holding them back from where they want to be.

Speaker A

Once we've resolved the trauma, or whatever the limiting belief or the negative story is, once we've resolved that subconsciously, then we start to focus on where they want to be in the future.

Speaker A

What's that big vision?

Speaker A

Because as you and I both know, that if we're stuck in that fight or flight survival mindset, we can't think about the big vision.

Speaker A

We can't conceptualize what that is, because, like, I'm just trying to survive here and now.

Speaker A

Who cares about that?

Speaker A

And so once we've cleared that side of things, there's so much space now.

Speaker A

The mind is open up.

Speaker A

We fired and wired new neural pathways in the brain that actually will enable them to think, oh, actually I could have a big vision now, what's that going to look like?

Speaker A

Okay.

Speaker A

And so then we start to enhance that neurologically and subconsciously and really embody what that looks like for them so that they have a target then.

Speaker A

And subconscious mind is a powerful thing.

Speaker A

And once we've established where they want to go in their life, we're off to the races subconsciously because they're going to think, feel and behave differently in their day to day lives.

Speaker A

So that's how I work with people.

Speaker B

I love that.

Speaker B

It's really interesting because I, I use a metaphor called break the cage and I, I picture people in a cage and cage has bars, right?

Speaker B

And you can see and you can see that thing that you want, that vision, but the bars are in the way.

Speaker B

And what you're telling me is with, you know, using that processing with the MDR and then getting them in alpha state where they can get auto suggestions and, or hypnotic suggestion and then reprogram it like it separates the bars, it takes the bars away and then they feel a freedom.

Speaker B

There actually isn't something in the way to start moving toward that thing before they were pressing up against the bars and reaching it.

Speaker B

They can't, you know, that kind of feeling.

Speaker B

So that's what went through my mind as you described that.

Speaker B

So I want you to tell people how to find out more about you.

Speaker B

If they've, if they've loved what you have, they've loved hearing your voice and your empathy.

Speaker B

And if they want to find out more about Stuart, like I gotta have me some more Stuart.

Speaker B

Where do they go to to do that?

Speaker A

Well, thank you for saying that, Kellen.

Speaker A

I appreciate it.

Speaker A

So my website is themindcoach.co.uk.

Speaker A

i'm based in the UK.

Speaker A

It's all one word, there's no hyphens or underscores.

Speaker A

Themindcoach.co.UK and social wise, I'm mostly on LinkedIn these days and my name on there is Stuart Wade.

Speaker A

I'm sitting there in a suit in my profile picture so it'll be easy to spot.

Speaker A

I'm also on Instagram and Facebook too.

Speaker A

Again, Stuart Wade on Facebook and then the Mind Coach UK on Instagram.

Speaker A

Those are the best places to find me.

Speaker A

And once, once we've communicated on there, we can communicate however's best.

Speaker B

Thank you.

Speaker B

What didn't I ask you that you need to tell me and listeners.

Speaker A

You didn't ask me about the book that I'm going to be writing.

Speaker B

I want to hear about the book you're writing.

Speaker A

So with your encouragement, which I really appreciate, I'm going to be writing a book I've co authored on another book previously called the Black Belt Mindset, which combines the martial arts, the mindset and the business.

Speaker A

And that.

Speaker A

That was great.

Speaker A

I loved that.

Speaker A

I'm actually going to be co authoring another one with the same author too in the coming months.

Speaker A

But I'm going to be writing my own book soon and so it's going to be about about my story in more depth.

Speaker A

More of the nitty gritty details than that I could share in a short podcast like this, but lots of that, lots of inspiration with it and then practical tools that I've learned through my time in clinical hypnosis, emdr, nlp, all the stuff that I've studied and learned as well with the story element, but the practical guidance as well.

Speaker A

So that's going to be coming soon.

Speaker A

So watch this space.

Speaker B

I can't wait.

Speaker B

Stuart, I want to thank you for sharing your heart, your empathy, your love, your passion and your desire to fix the world.

Speaker B

Thanks for being here.

Speaker A

Thank you, Kellen.

Speaker A

I appreciate that.

Speaker A

And thank you for having me hosting this podcast and facilitating because your empathy and your heart really shines through and I really appreciate you and all you do well.

Speaker B

Thanks.

Speaker B

So you guys, listen, take this to heart like every guest, but this one particularly has given you some very practical and very specific things to do and invited you to participate in your own growth and your own championship and your own winning.

Speaker B

And if you do that and don't delay, you'll be moving forward to create your ultimate life right here, right now.

Speaker B

Your opportunity for massive growth is right in front of you.

Speaker B

Every episode gives you practical tips and practice practices that will change everything.

Speaker B

If you want to know more, go to kellenflukermedia.com if you want more free tools, go here.

Speaker B

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